army of zombies
dear diary i dont know what day it is i dont know what time it is im listening to christian music i fell asleep on the couch last night watching the patriot i have been on the internet for a long time yesterday but most of the time i spend in chatrooms so i have not been doing this as often as i should and now i feel the urge to make an update its my birthday today we were telling family histories in the student lounge that was very fun i did some pictures of girls and animals yesterday they talked about the oppression of women and female circumcision how they prick the clitoris so that the blood flows out or fill the vagina with rocks then seal it up with needle and thread dont ask me how it works there are women being oppressed all over the world i have no idea what i am talking about i want to go to the shops as soon as my parents bring me some money last night i checked out jordans friends website www.two40.com it is weird and wonderful and has lots of cool links to bands like noise ratchet and firth clothing company there are green and white umbrellas outside over the tables to keep them from getting rained upon by storm clouds i have sore fingers i cut my nails to an inch of their life span i love going in chatrooms my favourite is talk city i have been doing lots of chatting lately i tried cool talk but they kept on insulting me i feel like a sleazebag in a teen chat and like a faker in hip hop chatrooms and like im too young and immature in chatrooms for people my own age i never fit in i always feel out of place woe is me for i am the president of a banana republic and nobody wants to come and visit my country woe is me for i am still single today is my birthday i am twenty one on t he three one it feels good to be in my hood i felt depressed last night because i was just sitting on the wall and i did not get nearly enough evangelism opportunities as i would have liked it was good to sit where there was lots of people talking about jesus it helps to keep the atmosphere glorified there were some righteous dudes talking about how jesus is the truth and quoting directly from the bible today i had a chocolate chip muesli bar an apricot muesli bar and a sandwich with lettuce tomato mayonnaise bbq sauce and three slices of cheese i have trouble seperating cheese slices so i always take too much of them i will not use computers today as much as i have done all the other days of the week it is just that i have been realising how little i have used the computers in my time here so far and i want to make up for lost time i usually sit downstairs and talk to people today we talked about the lives of our ancestors if we know where we come from maybe we will understand where we are going as the youth of the nations of the world and as youth with a mission from god to save lost souls now i am rattling on my keys trying to put your mind at ease i feel so faithless falling in and out of love i have no luck with the ladies i talk to girls in chatrooms and they hate my guts but thats alright because ive got plenty of fall back plans there are plenty of christian girls who are my friends who maybe could be my future bride but only if they love me and if i change my life drastically i dont deserve any of these girls round here they are too good for me and i am a dirty rotten sinner i am not good enough to be loved so that is why i look for girls online so im trying to justify my sins and it doesnt make any sense because sinning never does there is no justification for my actions there is no satisfaction guaranteed from my sleazy ways i dont want to go round picking up girls rounding them up like horses like love is a meat market i will try and change my evil ways i will think of girls as my friends and my sisters in christ i know i have been through this battle before whenever i feel pride i know pride comes before a fall so i try not to get a big head because i dont want to trip over my ears when im walking along talking to myself in strange voices trying out how to imitate the famous faces and mostly failing miserably there was a love feast this week for all the disco people who were leaving and a party for jim because he is going also my birthday party is between dinner and lights out after i have washed wiped and put away everybodys plates with the help of my good friends trevor and leah and janet and josh soon will be time for watching movies and eating mudcake i love the weekends today i woke up on the couch after watching the patriot the night before i was struggling to keep my eyes open after shabbat we all went into the city and talked to people about jesus i like making new friends but i never have anything original to say huan is advertising valentinas haircutting services he got his hair dyed back to black from blonde and orange it was like bizarre from d twelve we talked about the fourth dimension by yongi cho last time we had class and darcy and mark ng and dave niebling talked to us about faith and outreach experiences it was a good week we had prayer meetings every day at seven thirty the ones i missed i was sleeping and the ones i came to i was mostly sleeping sometimes listening to other people pray it is a cruel twist of fate that daryl and me are responsible for praying for our team when we were the ones who prayed the least i speak for myself daryl is an innocent victim i should b e forced to pray because i dont do any praying that makes some kind of logical sense i dont think it is possible to establish a long term relationship based on some kind of chatroom talking maybe if the girls i talk to online i meet in real life and they ever come to visit me or they live around the same area it is feasible that some kind of love thing may be established at some later date like further down the track but at the moment i have no time for girls i have to think about jesus having said that i am totally in love with abby who is definitely a girl and mighty fine as well but i try not to think about her too much otherwise it makes me depressed because she only wants to be friends and happy because im head over heels in love with her it is some kind of euphoria i have got to stop thinking about abby ellis i dont want other people to see maybe i need some kind of code name for her but i used butterfly princess on sarah i probably wont see her again either i may as well talk about girls for the next ten minutes i have nothing better to do then i want to find my friends and listen to music and read the bible and pretend to be a christian and ask for forgiveness from god for my sins i dont want to be a wolf in sheeps clothing i wish i did not have brain problems i love girls i love god i love abby ellis she is the queen of hearts she is the master of the universe now i am lost and lonely i dont know how i will survive come monday it is going to be extremely difficult to survive on outreach when i am pining for a girl who is just across the ocean papua new guinea and solomon islands are not too far apart but still nevertheless they are seperated by bodies of water and its not like i can just swim across the river and pay her a v isit but we can email each other from the capital cities she is such a good dancer she is a sweet singer too she has a lovely voice her instant messenger name is abyss i must remember that when im back home so i can talk to her instantly instead of having t o wait for an email to magically appear and say youve got male no ive got female and she is the most beautiful girl in the world ok that is crude terminology but it is the nature of the beast leave me alone are you gonna b e my girl do you want to rock my world sure i am a t eenage dirtbag baby it feels so good to finally be an adult yeah i can drink in america i can have sex since i was eighteen in australia and get married and get drunk in australia same time but none of that matters to me it is technically irrelevant seeing as drinking and drugs and special relationships are all hands off for the next couple of months i can look but i cant touch i can talk about everything but the physical so i must think about spiritual things which is hard for me to do playing sport is the way some guys deal with the last of physical intimacy round here i get more hugs just being a friend than i ever did by being a lover im a writer not a fighter im a swallower not a biter im a sucker emcee with a cuban necktie i dont think i have to wear a tie on outreach but id better take one just in case i found my northside correctional centre sports jersey today it was good to see again my sista girl wore it a few years at that horrible place now the filipino church is there the wounds still have not healed though much time has passed i like to wear my jacket backwards like kris kross but the weather is so hot that when i floss i had better take it off because i am dripping with sweat getting absolutely soaking wet i hate websites where people dont speak proper english like what i do im trying to be funny but it doesnt work i feel like a cad like the scum of the universe i point the finger but i point more back at me it helps to balance out the galaxy now i love abby ellis she is the bomb she is the cutest thing on two legs she is my moon and sun she thinks two heads are better than one and i agree then you can have eyes at the back of your head and see more than meets the eye it was love at first sight i have not stopped loving her since the day she got here i will probably come back and spill the beans more later but for now i think that i can only endure half an hour of diary time before i run out of ideas i have already repeated myself here too many times already i hope when i come back i g et more emails i love news from my friends its like news of the world only i learn a lot more information from my buddies than the tabloids will ever tell me i hate racism and sexism in all their forms if i am guilty as charged t hen i hang my head in shame i will try my best to treat everybody equally and not allow any subtle hints of wickedness to enter into my life i am finishing with good when i started with evil there is nothing wrong with loving girls its when i g et obsessed with one girl in particular that it becomes a problem i love abby ellis not that theres anything wrong with that but i have to wait until discipleship training school is over before i can do anything about it and i have to pretend that i just want to be friends and i only think of her like brothers and sisters we are friends forever we are soul mates i must do more than pretend i must change my thinking patterns t o reflect my world view through gods eyes god bless love zombie flesh the moon face one peace out my homies much love from dan the man :)
dear diary i dont know what i am going to do today we had story time week so dave and mark and jim have been talking to us about faith and evangelism it was heaps of fun i will not be here long i was given a gummy frog by erica i got to have lunch with abby i got her a white necklace and i got a black one for me so we have something to symbolise love and friendship i will not be here for long we have a meeting in five minutes so i dont have much time to talk to you dear diary i sent a poem to this love website that has been consuming my time lately sending a love poem each day and receiving a love poem every day also lunch was mondo excellent as usual the cooks efforts get better every day i love to eat and i eat to live i dont know how im gonna survive tomorrow when im not allowed to eat well it is next week i just plum forgot i have seven days to go until my fasting day still it shouldnt be too much hassle as long as i can stay away from the kitchen and dont have to look at food everything should be fine time is ticking i had better go downstairs and lock myself in the madhouse away from the real world i need to ask abby her email address again because i tried to send her an email a couple of times and it didnt work abby showed me how to dance last night she is such a fantastic dancer she is my best friend i saw lord of the flies it was cool to see abby afterwards and talk to her lord of the flies is about a bunch of boys who turn into savages when its no holes barred and no rules living on an island slap bang in the middle of the ocean and they think that this parachute dude is the devil in disguise and when they finally get rescued they have lost the ability to talk and have become savage beasts i got three slices of free vegetarian pizza from ramesh who watched the movie with us i hope i can talk to abby when my meeting is over i think abby has meetings all day long too but i should be able to see her at mealtimes there is going to be a lovefeast tomorrow night for disco students leaving on outreach and i think that abby is among those leaving for the solomon islands and india and china and ethiopia i dont know if everybody is going on the same day i am going on outreach next saturday my birthday is this saturday i will be twenty one on the thirty first i cant hardly wait time is ticking i have got to go i love you heaps i love abby she is cool she is simply the best i want to go to british columbia to see her when this is over she is the bomb she is beautiful girl she is drop dead gorgeous i love abigail olivia ellis she rocks my world i have a meeting to go to god bless you virtual people you are all special and i love you all heaps like my brothers and sisters i have been going online recently and if anybody reading this is in talk city my user name is zoot suit riot i only been there once but im coming back tonight god bless love daniel peace out more updates to follow kisses and hugs from zombiefleshthemoonfaceone denial incarnate ghost who walks the terror that sleeps by night and walks by day in the concrete jungle with black and white movies groovy baby i got nothing to say peace out no doubt love dan the man im late for a very important date with destiny see you soon on the dark side of the moon :)
dear diary this week has been good and bad sugar and spice and all things nice we read the bible so we get to eat pizza the disco girls and boys are on outreach all except for candice who for some reason i dont know is not going overseas enough said i dont know the circumstances she made me peanut butter and jelly jam sandwiches so mad props to her for that i did a picture of abby and a picture of me as the devil and a picture of jesus on the cross and a picture of a happy corpse burning in hell and one called the side effects of modern life which is just a bunch of triangles and an ankh and one called gloomy monday which is just me trying to use up all the rest of the grey paint this is not art this is just doodles and cartoons i did an ethiopian flag and a double headed axe i did lots of things i cant remember i did monster ex lax it will scare the poo out of you i did lots of crazy stuff i did nothing i do not move my limbs but i sit at a table and i paint when i am bored and depressed i wrote down and painted up all the things i think like hope i die before i get old only the good die young i hate myself and i want to die puppets on strings off with my head im better off dead its better to burn up and fade away and other such nothings of suicide solutions to my noise pollution last night we had shabbat it was more than fun and games it was a serious time with god ben makes me cry when he sings about jesus i was weeping my heart out for all the wrong reasons i feel so cold and numb i feel so far from god lately and nothing i can do can fix it up i threw away my self portrait as the devil because it was giving me the creeps but then i was trying to do something else to replace it and nothing i tried was good enough i did a girl in a tree with a bird on her head and a song which was basically my version of rape me by nirvana because i was feeling depressed like life sucks and life is meaningless i dont know the way i feel today i am somewhere in between mellon collie and the fake kind of jolly where if i roll over and pretend to be dead everything is going to be fine i did the menonite gangsta boogie the other day that was a whole lot of chuckles from the audience huan showed us his photo collection lots of people rolling their tongues and doing crazy sexy cool things we had a fashion parade with lady beetles and superwomen and aphex twins and princesses and angels and wonder underpants women and many impromptu skits like jon standing on one leg and reaching out towards the stars justin was the emcee for the night that was on thursday that was possibly the best day this week in the bible we read genesis and exodus and proverbs and matthew mark luke john acts and revelations we all read the bible in half hour slots i guess i was a microphone hog because i did it three times in a row at the start of the week we were taught about inductive bible study it was fun reading the bible it is good preperation to understand gods word better the disco girls and boys were told about post modernism there are birds singing outside i cant r emember all the painting that i did last night i tried to conceptualise abby twice but it would be better to paint her while she is sitting down looking at me then i can get it right last night kyle was playing never under estimate my jesus by reliant k and i played the anatomy of the tongue in cheek when he went to bed and finished up my notebook then i went outside and lo and behold there before me lay on the couch mark and juliane and candice was there too and so i read them some of my stupid nihilistic poems in my best impersonation of a radio voice i dont think they wanted to listen but i forced my opinions down their throats i assume a good time was had by all i think they wanted me to stop but they were being nice by listening to me talk in endless loops of self hatred i was trying to read blue horizon by wilbur smith i am still less than halfway through but hopefully i will be done by the end of next week i will probably have to select a new book for my book of the month club soon its that time of year again all good things must come to an end i need to spend some t ime with god the television is not working i want to watch rage and video hits if i can figure out how to get the tv working again maybe i have some friends with more technical minds than mine who can help me out in a jiffy but i dont know where to go if i need help i did go to bed eventually i went to sleep at five am and woke up at nine am and i had a dream that i was rapping with justice league it was like the sweetest coolest dream of my life and i hope it comes true it was kind of funny though because i was just freestyling it wasnt like verse bridge chorus i cant handle the formulas anyway i love to think out of the box even if i end up just banging on the walls and going nowhere at least i try to see beyond the square who am i kidding i was never an individual i was always a sheep at school i would follow the crowd i still do what my friends say i just have less friends than most people we play handball and make crossword puzzles we were the antisocials those were the glory days of high school i miss my school buddies but i burned all my bridges on the day i left and i never want to go back again not even to visit my sista is a beauty therapist and i am very proud of her my dad is a water cooler salesman i think he is happy now he has a job i am proud of mum and dad too mum is selling books she has to go to conferences she is going to bring me back some curry pies from maleny i guess i could have gone back home this weekend but i know i will see my parents next week on my birthday and tonight we are all planning on going into fortitude valley to watch the lion dance and help celebrate chinese new year it should be a lot of fun food is coming in a couple of hours time i never eat breakfast because i think that its a waste of time which is probably why my stomach is growling feed me for twelve hours until i give that sucker what it wants my tastebuds can be demanding kiddies sometimes i want to spend the whole day listening to the radio until i get kicked out the artroom maybe if i am lucky or god wills i will find people who are willing to have a jam session with me but there will probably be snowballs in hell before i get to play with a band again and its not my fault these things were decided behind my back i have no choice in the matter i wont stop feeling betrayed i will let the sun go down while im angry and i will give the devil a foothold i already have in too many ways i lash out at my parents for no good reasons i am angry at the world and my school and all the people in my past that did me wrong i know what i have to do is throw my bags of worries and sins down into gods forgetful sea at the old rugged cross where jesus blood will wash away all my sins i dont know if im ready and willing to be washed clean now today is a good day i will buy outkast new album as soon as i get cashed up again i dont know how to express myself i feel like the world keeps turning no matter what i do i love girls but i dont know how to have a long term relationship i thought that i would be able to change my evil ways but i cant i am a philanderer and a dirty rotten sinner i wish i was anywhere but here and anybody but me i know that the world is full of good people i love painting i love youth with a mission i love girls i love music i love life i dont want to die i want to grow old disgracefully god bless love daniel
dear diary hows it going i know i havent talked to you as often as i should but ive been busy ok so give me a break i was freestyling today for my homies pisa and danny and they were playing table tennis and i spilled coffee on the floor and mopped it up dont i live a very exciting life we read philemon in class today it was a whole heap of fun times now i dont know what to do lunch was good we had pancakes and french toast i must read imprisoned in iran before outreach in three weeks time i am looking forward to going to papua new guinea it will be the highlight of my existence i want to continue this website until the end of time even when i have nothing to say that happens a lot these days there is going to be a planet shakers thing tonight i dont know if im going or not i will probably get stomped on in the moshpit im afraid of big crowds i prefer a small circle of friends so i can jump up and down and scream in their faces like simultaneously aggressive and intimate rap and rock music now i love that kind of feeling i dont know what i did to make my friend mad at me i dont think i was dismissive but i guess its all in the interpretation of my actions its not what you say its how you say it i watched a movie called waking life about a dude who lived in a world of dreams and people keep talking to him about philosophies like self destructive man and a dude that drives a car boat down the street and a girl that thinks life is a soap opera and a man that is always seeking the holy moment so he misses it when it happens and he tries to make it happen when its not happening in the slightest today i woke up from my sleep i missed breakfast because morning meals seems like a waste of time i did have a vegemite sandwich the other day i am a happy little vegemite as the song goes i guess i am too patriotic and insular for my own good i dont know how to talk to strangers i have conditioned myself to accept four square walls as a way of life even though i am supposed to be out in the open i still prefer to hide and listen to music lunch is in the park sport is also i think i will play sport today i need to lose some weight i feel like a fat turd i love to waste other peoples time but i am precious when it comes to other people wasting mine i hate waiting for food or people to finish talking because if i dont speak my mind i forget what i was going to say people think i am rude for interrupting but the problem is that if i dont say it then its gone its all about living for the moment so i guess my life is kind of like waking life but if i ask people the meaning of life then i am orchestrating the movie into happening and thats not the way it works because this dude never asks for advice people just hand it out willy nilly but josh told me his theory that a good day is only a good day if you make it a good day because i have no mind of my own i would prefer to adopt other peoples philosophies i think that life is meaningless we are just carbon based bipeds nothing i do or say can make a difference actions speak louder than words lots of things make me suicidal and depressed like thinking that my friend thinks i hate him when i thought i was being nice but maybe i was being nasty by not being nice enough or i didnt pay enough attention to what he was saying i dont even know what i did wrong i hate problems that i have no way of fixing like starving children in africa or the war on iraq obviously there is a feasible solution to make love not war if there was peace and no weapons and no nukes then there would be no more wars but still the heart of man is exceedingly wicked we will always find a way to kill each other and hurt each other and hate each other no matter what where theres a will theres a way to die now i dont know why im on this earth i dont feel like a missionary i always want to call it quits i have nothing better to do im too lazy to make a book i can never think of what to say i want to go to heaven when i die i think i will stay here until the end of time or until i get kicked off we have to go to the park in a couple of hours i will make my way there slowly but surely i will drift out the door down the stairs and float down the road towards the park where a ball will miraculously be kicked across a big field full of dreams and food and plastic cups filled with cordial and excess amounts of legal grass now i am tired and angry i am cold and thirsty i have to keep going to the toilet because i drink more than my fair share of daily water intake i feel sorry for all those people who dont have enough money for outreach i want to make a hip hop videotime i will do it next week i have to avoid the newsagents because its like the twilight zone it just sucks me in and i can never get out again without spending all my money on stupid music magazines that i read once and throw away and the worst thing as that music makes are wank mags but worse than that is that it tells me about cool music that i cant buy because i spend my money on my magazines but its a catch twenty two because i cant find out about music unless i read magazines so its a vicious cycle that is causing me much stress but i have to embrace the chaos and keep rolling with my homies because nothing really matters no matter what i do now i have drunk all my water im getting high on my own supply i played all my music yesterday i spent the whole day in the art room i gave encouragement notes to all the mad and disco people but i still have to make them for all the other people here from the gold coast base and those who are mission builders who have not started yet and people who just happen to be here for no particular reason except that they make friends with people who do ywam and then they decide to do a dts which is a good thing the more the merrier but i run out of ideas too quickly i wish i had an infinite supply of compliments i need a treasure trove where i can go whenever i need a bag of flattery to tip over somebodys head i feel like my batteries are flat i feel so redundant and retarted i dont know how long i can do this i wish i was dead i am alive and breathing i am getting hair all over the place i got an email from my friend prina who is in canada at the moment my friend chelsea is in venezuela i hope she comes back soon it is my birthday in ten days time i am so excited i hope i get lots of presents it is josh birthday tomorrow i guess i can get him a present i gave vanessa a birthday song because she is twenty today she had flowers on the table and flowers in her hair mary ruth left today to go back to canada because she was love sick and she misses her boyfriend and she felt like her time here was done it was cool reading the bible today i guess we are all learning from each other it is a gradual process i am sure that there will be others to take my place when i am dead and gone i want to go to work and i want to come out and play i need to send emails to all my friends so they dont forget about me i still have to email all the beach to bush girls and evelyn and tali my papua new guinea and fijian friends who i will hopefully see in three weeks time if we go to lei which we will but they are in madang which is only a short way away but i think they are going to visit us instead now today i am going to sit under the tree and talk to the birds because im crazy like that bobby needs to use the computer i love you all heaps all you people who read my website mad props to my friends and family shoutout to all my homeboys and homegirls who be feeling this wigga pull the trigger on me god bless love you heaps you are all shiny happy people just chill out no doubt love zombiefleshthemoonfaceone aka dan the man :)
dear diary i dont know how to tell you all the things that are on my mind right now it still feels like im talking to a brick wall every time i do this because i know that you cant talk back well i may as well update anybody who is interested in knowing what i have been doing since i last posted blogger now i am back in the house youth with a mission it feels so good to be home we were at sonfest all week it was a christian music festival accomodating every possible type of musical taste and it was a lot of fun we had to clean toilets but we got to mosh heaps and there was music up the wazoo before i left i met my parents down the road when i was trying to find brookside shopping centre and they got me spring rolls and a clown ice cream cone it was cool because i couldnt find it otherwise but now i know the shopping centre is down the road past the train station and just across from the mc donalds which i love because it tastes so very good i feel so lame today the reason for my shopping expedition was i was looking for magazines with articles for sonfest though i failed in my quest i still managed to get heaps of magazines which i promptly dumped in the bin because nobody wanted to read them then my good friend pisa from island breeze let me listen to a fantastic fiji singer named diko diko it was very sweet melancholy music i scored a free cd by soulgrain because i was the only one moshing up a maelstrom and they said anybody who is dancing can win a cd so i ripped off limp bizkit and snoop dogg i was crip hopping and rap rocking like jonathan davis on a bad hair day yeah i just go spastic in the moshpit but it was fun my toes were covered with bugs i was sleeping in a puddle of mud every night it was good to see my friends again last night we had long conversations about evolution and what we were going to name our babies no joke i had milo and we all helped to put up the tents and clean them out and we washed the bus and the van and wayne was very grateful i ate most of josh salt and vinegar chips but i was not the only culprit my main thing to report and what i dont want to think about because it means i have no future in mad apart from climbing up the walls is that malachi five for the best of all intents and purposes no longer exists i did not get the opportunity to take part in a freestyle battle because i had to do tent sitting which means listening to speeches about jesus for three hours as well as much worship music they were talking about how sex is worth the wait i try not to think about gender too much it always gets me into trouble i got abby a double pack of green freddos i had a dream upstairs last night i was watching bobbys video for hallelujah night the idea is to reclaim halloween for jesus i hope i can watch his menonite history video this weekend as well as my beat the drum dvd which nobody wanted to watch with me shame on them now i am here alive and breathing oh why is my brain so messed up life was good at sonfest the best part was being able to hear music basically any time of day no matter where i happen to be at the time i wish i did not lose so many friends through my procrastination and lack of staying in touch i am no good at keeping in contact i want to make a video and send it overseas i need to purchase a tape first i am looking forward to my birthday i am leaving for papua new guinea in three weeks time i dont know how to relate to the opposite sex when i talk to girls i try to think about their spirits and not about their bodies i wish i was more emotionally sensitive i get angry easily but i have no sympathy for other people that is my biggest problem right now plus i need to get my assignments done and i cant find my book to read to do my report on i will stay awake tonight i will not go to sleep i will read wilbur smith blue horizon because i have been trying to read it for the past three or four weeks its been long time no see i would like to get outkast speakerboxx the love below cd as soon as possible i told my parents to get me christian hip hop for my birthday because they wont get me a dog so the next chicken gets christened xanadu i probably come across in this as totally selfish i do like people i am not as bad as i make you think i am that is the fault with being honest it lets people see your innermost secrets i guess i dont post as many entries as i should or could i have the day off today so i am able to let loose and expose the real me whatever that means i have not been here for a couple of weeks when i am not here i have an excuse not to make updates in my diary but otherwise i should whip myself into action get my rear in gear stop slacking off and try to analyse where do we go from here all my relationships with girls suck i cant remember the answers they give to my questions i suffer from short term memory loss but i remember things that happened years ago and dumb facts about pop stars that are completely irrelevant oh yes i must look beyond my selfish ways and make mention of the fact that ian and sarah are getting married ian works in the office and sometimes drives the bus i think they are tying the knot overseas after a while of this my back is getting sore oh dear what shall i do orthopedic chairs are not a ywam speciality the best thing about ywam is free food plus they let you sleep on the couch if you are too lazy to go to bed i prefer to think in third person it makes me feel less selfish even when im still talking about myself but im talking like im talking about somebody else and im sure that could have been said in a lot less words but im not very good with words at the moments i sure heard a lot of them this week though lots of slogans on t shirts lots of mud and dirt and cups in the moshpit i found two sombreros and a couple of diet cokes that tasted warm and strange and fizzy i can never squeeze the words out of my brain that i want to say it is like trying to get blood from a banana its just not gonna happen now i have some personal problems that i dont want to go into detail about here lets just say sealice bit me on the nutsack christmas week and it still hurts and my feet are all crazy like bubbles and ripples like i have spent the week soaking in dishwasher liquid soap but its just because we have been feet deep in mud all week long our nickname for sonfest was mudfest when there was no rain there was people throwing water at other people unfortunate enough to be in the line of fire i was a victim of splashback just because stars do it ordinary people think its ok to join in the fun but ive got news for chicks and dudes it sucks getting water thrown at me and if spitting is wrong then why should a soaking be any different surely there is so correlation between saturation and the manifestation of disgust that comes from a lack of satisfaction with consumer mindset individuals who surge the moshpit and kick me in the feet every time i try to move yes i had a good time at sonfest i love cleaning toilets i love mud covered walls and washing toilets and bleeding girls bathrooms and mopping up the floor i suck at toilet cleaning but it is fun to tell people what to do to push them around and tell them to wait another five minutes because none of those suckers is ever gonna wanna come out of the shower and let us finish the job im talking four hour toilet cleaning sessions still i have to look on the bright side cleaning toilets is mondo compensation for free tickets i mean you got to work if you want to play work sucks but i love music there was newsboys and pillar and jars of clay and relient k and antiskeptic and lots of wonderful little australian bands i saw jael and soulgrain and the best of all was justice league i save the best til last it is good to hear australian christian hip hop music there was floyd wayne and crosswords i saw a lot of school friends and some people who were in year eleven when i was in year twelve and they graduated last year im not sure how that works but they were a few years below me and now they are home free and living their lives no more prisoners of society oh yes i also got to talk to lots of girls and boys i didnt know very briefly like hows it going i didnt get to have many deep conversations i mostly stuck to myself like a bad smell like i was so sick of talking to brick walls music was second to none i will probably go home this weekend i want to see my parents again i have got the day off today i know i always talk about stuff rather than talking about emotions but a mans got to do what a mans got to do which is eat drink sleep and watch television i live a shallow life i have no prospects for the future i want to go to my samoan church on sunday i havent seen my peeps in almost a year i need to get my vocoder fixed so i can make some more rap tapes for all my new found friends and some of the old ones as well i am making people wait for the computer i am being selfish again i get lost in the music in the moment of happiness that comes from being able to express myself in virtual reality now i cant see through the curtains there is a leaders meeting going on upstairs i hope that the mad room will be open soon so i can play the radio or listen to my expanding christian music collection i hope my parents give me money when i go home i love my mum and dad very much trevor wants to use the computer so i am getting off now smile jesus loves you say hi to your mum for me i am the sum total of my body parts i am the scum of the universe god bless you feather dusters may god have mercy on your soul drive safe buckle your seatbelt and dont forget your toothbrush oh yes mary and jason went on a date last night thats all folks peace out no doubt kisses and hugs lots of love from zombiefleshthemoonfaceone the son of a gun who exists in a world of rhyme and reason out of season seeing is believing except for us its in reverse order crossing the borders im thoughtless what i do with my time is anybodys guess i must confess that im a sinner everytime i want to think about god i associate worship music with girls instead i need to spend more time with god life sucks death rocks i am in love with girls who hate my guts thats the way it always works but life goes on thats the way life is i wish i was a space monkey i wish i could live and die in la or mars you know that we are all made of stars i want to die i hate my life i want to be with god i want to get closer to god i need to read the bible and pray more often i had a dream last night about the butterfly princess coming back which is going to happen but it hasnt happened yet imagine gods love to go leave the ninety nine sheep and find the one that is missing and to die for us that has to be the greatest love of all i could never love god as much as god loves me and indeed t he whole world to die and rise again i give mad props to jesus christ and to all my homies all around the world because they rock like green eggs and spam fox in socks zebras in jam jars i want to go to canada and india and it would be nice to go back to africa i miss ethiopia i dont know if tigist still loves me i dont deserve to be loved but it would be nice if we could still be pen pals i guess i am too manipulative i am faithless the wonder boy its like i love a different girl every other week always falling in and out of love wetting my bed over beyonce and shes never going to love me because shes married to jay z and all my thoughts are crazy i love punk versions of pop songs i am addicted to cover versions all my clothes smell like mud when i come back from sonfest life is beautiful everybody has admirable qualities sometimes you just got to dig deep in order to find the flowers and chocolates in everybodys soul i know there is good in everybody i love people but i hate myself and i want to die my life is a rollercoaster ride of peace love and crabs i need to write a book i need to think more happy thoughts i want to collect all my poems together and pubish them four times a year in a magazine called zombie room but i am too lazy to get my act together and actually do it the plan is to make a poem annual with five hundred poems and five hundred pages that should not be too impossible and it doesnt have to all be positive it can be negative as well in the meantime this is a good place for me to express my thoughts even if nobody ever sees this website at least i will know that there is a place where i can tell the world who i was and what i did just because i have a massive ego or maybe its therapy it makes me feel better to bare my soul its like the modern day version of going to a priest to confess my sins i wont say its like prayer because its too messed up and my parents know of the existence of this website but i hope they dont check it too often because i talk about more bad than good stuff i am trying to remember what floyd from justice league told me when i told him he was a cool rapper because he stuck to the gospel and i said i find it hard not to compromise and he told me dude every time you sin just ask god to forgive you and dont give up on jesus because he never gives up on you i believe that is true and that was some good advice from a man of god and i will try to stay in touch with my friends and pray and read the bible more often i dont feel like im good enough to get into heaven but i dont want to burn in hell either i feel like a pumpkin head like im between dreams or stuck between the worlds of life and death thats why im a zombie because im one among the walking dead im just a brick in the wall my life is meaningless im just a stupid waster who never does his assignments so ill never be a leader ill always be a waster ill never amount to anything im just a sucker emcee who wants to be a hip hopper but i dont even have a band i hope i can take part in the talent show i must give glory to jesus and not soak in others admiration because all glory belongs to jesus because he died to set us free from the law of sins and death and i know i am a fundamentalist exisentialist who should be blacklist from all the clubs because im just a scrub hairy and scary like a wooly haired caterpillar like grub i want to grow dredlocks or get hair extensions i should probably get off the computere soon the next time somebody wants to go online i will do exactly that but until then i will just keep on rolling i told myself i will get off in a minute so i will be gone in sixty seconds i hope i can get my stuff out from the mad room i want to sit under the tree with the birds and spend time with god im such a useless slob this is my day off smile jesus loves you god bless love zombiefleshthemoonfaceone aka daniel aka deep think :) peace out
