purple monkey dishwasher #3 the story so far ;) Changes: Ive got to stop seeing young girls as potential romantic conquests and start visualizing them as sisters I’ve got to quit sleazing on them like im their future mister and start protecting them like a brother weve gotta look out for each other I know im a work in progress Lord I’ve still got a lot of work to do in my life/ before I can dodge all this trouble and strife that plagues me everywhere I go/ I always told myself I don’t even have a wife but if I did I’d treat her right/ now the time has come to put my money where my mouth is quit acting rude start acting polite/ time to demonstrate I actually believe in Christ/ shine my light through the way I live my life/ want to be more hard hitting even though im revealing my mind is flea bitten/ the kind of mind you are better off getting rid of than hanging around your doorway/ some liars say theres more ways to heaven than one/ but their brains got thieved like a steel aluminium/ if you cant be real then you may as well hit the road son/ or daughter if you wont pay no heed to the words your parents taught ya Theyre getting older time to get a little bolder in your faith don’t keep it under a rock for none/ who come along and try to beat you up Heat you up eat you up make you eat their dust/ don’t let them suckers defeat you now/ recognize your inner strength you got a giant called Jesus living inside you boys and girls/ don’t worry about the poison dripping from their keyboard fingers or their mouths/ just rep Him up big time til you meet Him in the skies/ don’t let it stress you out if you don’t get things your own way/ if you get physically or emotionally tortured for Christ’s sake/ hold onto his promises don’t let them shake you loose from that stand you decided to take/ back when the world was young/ don’t let the devil remind you of your past mistakes/ just tell him of his future you know hes gonna bake in that fiery lake We don’t want to follow him so we stay in the present moment focused on the glory of god who never stops loving us even when we mess up We just gotta get down on our knees and fess up/ don’t get stressed out when we don’t feel like weve got the clout to take on those influenced by demons/ they may be bigger than us physically or intellectually but they will never conquer the God who lives inside of us And his opinion of us is more significant than anything they can ever come up with/ which is just based on lies anyway not the truth we actually know about us/ that we are children of the living God/ undefeatable by circumstances/ even when your world seems to be going down the gurgler/ even when your romantic relationship gets thieved by burglars/ did you ever stop to think maybe God took that person away cos they weren’t a good fit for your life anyway/ did you ever stop to consider maybe you were better off without that trash talking in your life Did you really think you would make the perfect husband and wife/ why do you keep on fooling yourself drooling over these girls that are heading in the opposite direction to you spiritually/ you know they are only gonna pull you down with them/ they are not gonna lift you up and you are not gonna be able to be that savior for them/ youre fooling yourself if you think you can change them/ cos you will probably end up getting changed by them/ if you ever get together/ I think about all the compromises I was willing to make just for the sake of a little bit of temporary happiness/ just a smidgen of euphoria/ I was so foolish thinking her company was so glorious/ but it was gory the way she messed up my morality/ left it bleeding on the floor what a fatality/ and she didn’t care in the slightest/ cos she didn’t delight in the God I serve or want to unite with me in Christian fellowship/ why did I think I could alter a woman who wasn’t equally yoked with me/ I must have had egg for brains/ I must have cracked mine totally/ I cant believe I could be so stupid to ignore the godly women that were right under my nose the whole time/ its funny how we don’t even think about the damage we are doing to ourselves until its way too late I really want to compensate myself for all the time ive lost for all it cost me to see my priorities changing to see how much I was willing to switch up just for the sake of her happiness/ just to see her smiling even while I was defiling myself – the dwelling place of the Holy Spirit I really need to figure out what it is about her that I love so much/ I know its deeper than just pure lust although that was a huge part of it I know I need to change the way I am/ and figure out what the devil is doing/ I need to get to work separate myself from the lies of the enemy and the truth of who God says I am deep down inside/ its only when I try to resist the voice of the enemy turning temptation into an actual deed that I realise that wasn’t me speaking and that freaks me out to think that I adopted the voice of the enemy as my own thoughts I got tired and I let down my guard/ I let that fake lion that dirty dragon that over my soul/ I allowed my mind to be perverted diverted from the course the holy one intended for me/ to go on flowing down the river trying to tear down Babylon trying to find the will to carry on When I’m weak at the knees/ when I’m fixing to please someone other than myself/ when I cant handle the truth that my candle is burning down/ oh Lord I wake up in fright what if I lost my light/ maybe im just losing it and it hasn’t burned out yet / maybe theres some way to reignite it/ maybe chilling with my godly homies can help get that fire started again/ I need some holy redheads you know what I mean Im not talking cherry blossom from archie comics / or Pauline hanson/ cracking jokes like ted danson trying to be hands on in my approach I never had to live in a house where I slept on a mattress sharing space with a family of roaches/ but I do keep a room with tarantulas , plenty of ants and the occasional mouse scurrying about on my carpet as the possums crawl around my roof having block parties by moonlight Im a preachers kid like Marilyn manson but my path diverted from his just like elvis the pelvis presleys did/ want to live on a desert island for a little while go off the grid/ if any honey wants my heart I will take the first bid/ so long as she’s not old enough to be my baby squid I’m getting old now better wake up and smell the mould how / did I get so crusty why did I let my skills get so rusty need to sharpen them up before I lose the plot completely/ Jesus complete me give me a life that’s easy & take away my mean streak cos theres enough of that already on these mean streets/ I wasn’t born to be beaned over hard beats/ this lard lad who somehow managed to cheat death whoopee/You cushion my fall when I fall down / know youre gonna be there for me for the long haul now/ before your name the world bows wow Vested interests ( in the lives of these kids who gonna lead the world into the future); Tell me when the miracles start to happen when I stop making excuses for my stupid actions when I can sing praise and worship songs all day at work and not worry about the jerks who tease me and make me foam at the mouth/ oh no im crazy enough already I don’t need anyone trying to push my buttons/ lambs dressed up as mutton things aren’t what they seem but they never cottoned on and theyre living in a daydream Still waters run deep I really need to get some sleep I need to stop acting like a creep but you know real love that lasts forever don’t come cheap/ you gotta put in work you gotta be persistent fire proof and heat resistant if you wanna go that distance gotta show commitment Gotta prove it in your actions got to chase more than consumer satisfaction/ pursue this sentimental attachment this divine love that nothing can come below or above/ growing up throwing up props to the king better than cops who pursues the unjust who I can trust to vindicate me in the eyes of my oppressors/ follow his commandments they aint just suggestions/ do as he requests and you wont ever go wrong man You will find a place where you belong man/ and ladies just a figure of speech man/ but I aint ever gonna call a chick dude or dudette that aint my style pet/ nah you wont catch me calling you dear or darling unless you wanna be my bird my precious little starling/ only got one of you theres no replacing you/ so I wont have to feel guilty when im facing you/ or have my eyes looking over my shoulder when I start embracing you/ yet again/ its been too long waiting for this rain to quit falling/ cant you see im calling your heart girl/ God is watching over you I know that for sure/ and one day we gonna eat at the same table again/ if im able to hang on / keep my promises instead of sweeping them under the carpet like dirty dishrags/ but you are not my dirty little secret im loud and proud of the fact that youre my sweet heart I know I still have to learn from the mistakes of the past/ I think I will never be able to stop myself from falling into the same old traps Staring into a solar eclipse until my eyes go blind/ maybe if I didn’t have all this visual stimulation I wouldn’t be such a troublemaker But the mind has a funny way of getting itself stuck in potholes/ my brain can still go wandering to some dark places beyond my control I hate to think that maybe I brought all this evil on myself/ I hate to have a guilty conscience/ I hate to live with myself I wish I couldn’t This affliction seems never ending/ I don’t know how I ended up so scarred and wounded by the past/ could you be the one to love me Could you be the one who sticks around when everybody else runs away from me/ I wonder why you don’t flee at the sight of me Maybe youre too scared to tell me to leave/ it could be that you love me and you care about me/ you want to treat me tenderly but you just don’t know how/ let me teach you how to treat me/ with kid gloves with tender loving care/ please don’t be so brutal with my heart darling Cant you see mine is pining for your touch/ I want to hold you so desperately it’s killing me/ I desire you above all others in this world I don’t know if you are capable of handling this heat you produce in my body/ this fire you inspire inside of me/ it’s more than you can take isn’t it/ do you want me to be honest with you/ or would you rather I hid the truth/ that I’m addicted to you like crack cocaine honey What is it about you that makes me so psycho over you/ why do I act like that freaky clown whenever I’m around you miss marvelousness I cant seem to stop myself from falling in love with you/ I wonder what it is about you/ that tastes like magic to my eyes and ears You are so visually stimulating/ I’m intimidated at the thought of such incredible maturity in one so young/ why has that cat pulled out your tongue/ what is it about me that freaks you out so much/ don’t you know how much I crave your gentle touch/ like angel breath on my cheek You kick my troubles straight into next week/ you are the heat I seek with the missiles of my mouth/ want to take you down the aisle Do more than just check your profile/ you know my style/ I would give all the money in the world just to see that beautiful smile light up your face/ the one I want to embrace / more than any other in this galaxy/ I would build a palace for you madame if I only had the greens Hey princess do you want to go for a ride with me/ I will provide for your every need/ make you nice and fat and happy/ feed you chocolates And hire someone else to change our future babies nappy/ I can’t handle that grossness so it’s not fair to make you deal with it either But your breasts were made for feeding milk to our child/ you know it’s better off when he or her feels your nipples squirting nutrient in their gob/ yes I have a job for you/ to have me and to hold me in holy matrimony for the rest of our living days/ how bright we blaze together Like fireflies in the twilight/ they say breast milk is better than powder but if that’s a route we have to go down so be it /We will face every storm together that comes across our lives/ I don’t think I can survive without the happiness you bring to my existence/Did you forget how you travelled down the same paths and wound up at opposite ends/ my friends we are quick to forget each other’s kindness/But we have elephant like memories when it comes to each other’s misdeeds/ can I be a little less sleazy you know life isn’t easy for everyone Some people have to sleep under bridges/ some people make a home out of boxes intended for the use of temporary storage for fridges/Some people can play didgeridoo and others don’t have those skills so they just fund those who have the ability to entertain their eardrums We have been through the wars together/ we can reach that place of peace if we fight hard to keep a hold of our love stop it falling apart I fall to pieces whenever I’m around you/ I know you’ll just be packing your bags and leaving me all over again almost as soon as we meet/ So I struggle to put on a brave face/ when it’s shredding me apart at the seams/ I have difficulty smiling when I see you drifting away from me/ I wonder what I did to hurt you/ that you put so much distance between us/ I wonder why I can’t please you twenty four seven 365 Why is it so difficult to keep a smile glued permanently to a woman’s face/ and have it look natural like she isn’t a mannequin or a freaky alien Why do I fail at love/ why can’t I be your can opener and get you to open up/ maybe you are a ringpull instead but my fingers are too stubby and I fail even at that simple task/ if you simply desire me to inspire you I am willing to put aside my schedule and do whatever you ask/ let me bask in your warm radiance for a little while/ let me soak up the rays of your beatific smile/ you bless me just by being yourself The gung ho approach: oh honey why is it that I want you so bad and you would rather be on the other side of the globe what can I do to kill this disturbance in you/ I know getting up close and personal with me is a difficult experience for you / can I calm your fears and chase away those tears for you my love I would do anything just to make you giggle with glee/ love the way you shake and wiggle and jiggle makes me jump up out of my seat saying yes momma I want you bad you just can’t be beat/ you’ve got me so glad swept me off my feet/ like a tree uprooted from a cliff face by strong waves I’m bowled over by the powerful force of your sweet heart/ memories keep flash flooding back to me now/ learning how to behave/ stop living like a resident of the graveyard/ stop acting like I’m that same doomed unredeemed kid/ like righteous boy got kidnapped and wicked boy took his place/ oh Lord help me now take up residence in my heart be the president of my life/ help me always put you first there’s a struggle raging on within me / makes me wonder if I’ve got the strength to keep on going/ feels like I’m at the end of my energy I need to restore my supply I need you el shaddai/ only you can make that difference in my life/ help me go the distance when I subsist on Trouble and strife/ help me get a brand new diet for my mind/ cos this diet of worms is just not healthy for me/ it’s wrecking havoc with my Spiritual digestion system/ I really need to love you with my whole heart/ instead of taking a half hearted lackadaisical approach to this I need to take it serious cos it’s serious business/ we could be doing damage or feeding seeds of truth to these kids/ we have a responsibility To do the right thing with our mouth and words/ we must let our actions speak loudly of the king who loves us/ we must not put out contradictory vibes/ if I ever did Lord I’m sorry for that/ feels like I’m on skid row and there’s no turning back/ you must be kidding me If you think I’m returning to that same old tragic place again/ today is a brand new day so I will no longer bump into my old ways down a dark Alleyway and allow them to sneak inside my face/ got to guard my eyes and ears and mouth/ be careful only godly things come in and out See I’m so weak I give in so easily/ I allow temptation to completely suffocate and snuff out my will power/ like a glass placed over a candle Insulating that heat and snuffing it out instantly/ feels like I haven’t the strength to keep on breathing/ if it means that youre no longer next to me/ I suspect my expectations are shifting/ as I drift off to sleep with my eyes open wide then gradually becoming tighter shut in a Short period of time/ it doesn’t take much of a percentage of eternity/ to drop off the cliff of lethargy into dreams/ I build an effigy of my Sweet honey who makes me come back for more/ compels me to be persuaded by her magnetic charms/ like the alphabet letters we used to use on our fridge door/ she pulls me into her/ I feel myself getting sucked into her orbit/ I can’t help myself my legs pick up off the ground As she pulls me into her zone/ as my flesh and bones become tangled up in hers/ married to mine they are entwined like grapes on a vine Im crushed on her think I might make some wine/ try to be genuine in a world full of fakes/ where you don’t get prosecuted for imitating gender just handbags and video discs/ funny how the world changes/ wake up one day and everything once familiar now looks like strangeness I didn’t even have to spend half a century preserved in a cryogenic chamber for this drastic speedy change to happen in our society either The dragon’s tooth is digging in my skin/ please won’t you open up the door and let us in/ we are not the spacemen or monkey people you were expecting/ we are not the creatures lurking under the sea/ going bezerk in the living room of your ship shape pistol fashioned periscope Toting submarine/ we are ready to discharge our guns in your faces/ we don’t have enough ammo to bring this world back to scrappy basics Hang on you may be surprised what you find out when you take the time to dig around inside my mind/ full of fury pure thought and filth This place has seen its fair share of visitors/ their ghosts still linger down the coridoors/ you can hear the echo of their voices as they linger In the air for seemingly endless decades/ seamlessly blended into the background noise/ you may be uncomfortable with the company of spirits You may feel as if you are getting the heeby jeebies every time you walk into this room/ but fear not God is with you wherever you go For some people there is a difference between what they are supposed to believe according to their social circles and what they actually believe But in my case the two match each other/ I just have difficulty practicing what I preach/ reaching the lost with the message of the cross Trying to find wholeness in a world full of emptiness/ could I be the one to hold you down when the world seems like it’s filling your ship Up with sludge/ by the bucketload/ by the army and lorry full/ why do you worry about the future you can’t change without divine intervention/ why do you stress about the neighbors when we hardly have to see them/ they are far more bothersome when they stab at Our hip pockets with complaint/ this should be the most beautiful thing in the world/ getting the time to offload all my private thoughts So why am I so distraught/ is it because I’m hitting that wall of mental blankness again/ choosing sleep rather than facing my challenges With God’s help I know it’s possible to overcome them/ flash back to bible lessons/ rip off the truth of the gospel and soon enough I’m home free/ why would I let the stresses or the pleasures of this world bother me in the slightest/ when I know I’m loved by the king who never gloves His intentions towards me/ I know sometimes I think I know it all and then bitter experience dictates to me that I was wrong all along Unlike my hypothesis/ things turned out to be heading in the opposite direction to what I intended them to / things are going swimmingly Yet my head is swimming too much when I’m around you/ need to cool my jets down and stop baking up a sweat whenever youre in my vicinity I never intended to steal your virginity or pluck your flower of innocence from that fertile garden flourishing between your tremendous legs Although I want to strike while the iron is hot I only mean it in terms of sticking another coin in the slot so we can have this dance I wouldn’t do anything untoward with you/ I’m not so forward that I will take you in my arms at our first sitting even if I had a chance to Yes maybe I was in a vulnerable place where anything might have happened between us if someone hadn’t intervened and interrupted our solace I would like to think I would be able to control my urges if they just left the two of us alone together until it was time to go home again The smirking sausages: Don’t look to me for advice you know I’m only going to lead you in the wrong direction darling/ my dalliance with evil has become an obsession I try to cut it out of my life and leave it behind but it plagues me with vague assertions of what I’m missing out on by avoiding its company Yet I know in my heart of hearts that I’m more blessed without it/ and with it I’m stressed and too uncertain to talk about my faith The devil cuts me off from my God given abilities/ with a curt dismissal of my talents saying I’m going to use them all for my glory No evil one I won’t allow you to make me your puppet/ I have Jesus living inside my heart and He’s calling me out of these dark woods I won’t hibernate like a bear sleeping away my life hiding in a cave/ I won’t let the chorus of doom to suffocate my ability to affect change Break my chains Lord I don’t wish to return to that familiar place of becoming a prison to my selfish desires again/ throw them in the fire for good/ let disillusionment and despair no longer enter into my neighborhood/ keep them well away from us like the dog dashes from the flea You remove my transgressions from me as far as the east is from the west/ to put it into perspective I could run around the world and it still Wouldn’t measure the distance you have placed between my sins and i/ you have made me a brand new man you have given me a brand new life I know there are days when it feels like everything is going my way everything is perfect and nothing can possibly go wrong to upset this balance/ I know there are times when everything is sunshine and lollipops and the stormclouds and raindrops seem like a long distant memory Or something out of someone elses dream that has no bearing on my own personal version of reality/ but then lightning strikes and crashes on me/ we have so many things on our shelves that are strictly ornamental/ we just like to look at them have other people admire them and never Use them for ourselves/ I hope we don’t treat the bible like that but I know I do sometimes/ why wouldn’t I use a tool designed by God To help me overcome every problem in the world/ it’s the crampons that helps me climb up the mountain of difficulties I’m facing each morning It’s the knife that cuts my bread and the sword that stabs the demons I dread sneaking out from under my bed and frightening the living daylights out of me/ it’s the armor I wear that chases away my catastrophes/ it’s the helpful advice that turns away wrath directed at me It’s the cool calming words I need to chase the heat away/ to defeat the devil when he pesters me topples my resolve and makes me bow my knee to a foreign god a false deity/ when he tries to set himself up as king of my heart a spot that rightfully belongs to Jesus from here to eternity/ I have been that shrinking violet for far too long when it comes to spreading the love of Christ/ I make up excuses like it’s just too hard to get the conversation started and break that godly ice/ but look at some of the speakers I admire they make sharing the gospel look as easy as pie/ use this music Lord as a vessel to fill the world with your spirit/ silence the voice of the enemy who entreats me to surrender Help me to do the things that please you and run away from the things that only please myself/ help me bring glory to you in all I say and do In the secret place and the public place/ its so easy to be a Christian when I’m around other Jesus freaks when I’m buoyant with that godly Experience/ feel like a bouncing tiger or a slinky jumping up and down with springs superglued underneath my feet/ I get defeated so easily I get cheated from that peaceful heart experience/ I allow too much of the world to infiltrate my Christianity/ I pretend to be a gangster For the sake of coolness/ when it’s obvious to everyone who knows me I’ve never slept a night out in the streets/ I don’t have that look Of desperation in my eyes/ you can’t see that anger and bitterness lurking under the surface of my smile like a monster waiting to leap out its cage/ you can’t see the hunger and the vileness in me/ you can’t see the compromises I’ve made just to keep my virtuous woman honest You don’t know what it’s like to own clothes all tattered and torn to not be able to afford a space to rent so I can shower and change my Clothes and be happy and content/ I would gladly trade places with you/ funny how you protest about taking a shower silly bunny Don’t you know I’d give my right arm just to have a warm bed to sleep in/ yet you are out all night partying in the clubs like you don’t have A home to go back to / cos you’re dealing with the loneliness lying to yourself nobody loves you/ yet you should know cos the guy on the soap box told you so/ Jesus loves you He won’t let you go / even if you mess up/ even when you get stressed out and do some stupid things That you later on wind up regretting/ how many times have I let my anger motivate me to forget about my troubles with a little bit of sin Thinking it doesn’t harm anyone/ forgetting I am actually the one it’s harming/ how often have I turned to false comfort for closeness When I should have turned to the gospel forgetting it means good news/ only remembering the passages about judgement and wrath Forgetting all the passages about help for times of trouble/ you say call to me and I will answer/ so I called to you and I heard a whisper My child seek me in the eyes of others/ seek me in those who love life and encourage one another/ can’t you see me moving in that birdsong If you just open your eyes for me you will find me everywhere/ why are you so foolish/ why do you turn your face away from me so often I just want to look at you/ you don’t have to be ashamed/ just set your gaze on me my child and I will take you to a better place I will pull you out of this maze of worlds you live in and take you to a higher plane of existence/ where nothing in this world can bother or trouble you/ even in the middle of the storm I can give you my peace/ I will cover you with my feathers I will cause your blessings to increase and your misery to decrease until it fades away from existence if you simply set your focus on me I’ll be seeing dimples on your cheeks again soon enough/ just hold my hand when those circumstances get difficult to face/ don’t bolt when you see me calling you What are you afraid of I’m not the one picking on you I just want to wrap my arms around you I want to wipe away those tears not Cause you to shed some more/ you are so used to people treating me like a stick trying to beat the living daylights out of you You forget about my loving embrace/ you forget that I want to come to you and comfort you/ you forget I want to give you peace/Why do you let the world dictate who I am and how I act/ why wont you let me prove myself to you/ why won’t you let me show you who I am Cutting through the noise: Yeah it’s true what the pastor say sometimes you just have to get away/ in order to face the day when everything tumbles into disarray around you/ I know that you are speaking to me/ I know your truth is leaking through/ I don’t want to be arrogant about it I don’t want to act like I’m better than anybody else or profit from the fact that I’m possibly acting as your seer or oracle I know you give dreams and visions to plenty of people but they don’t pay attention to them/ they just close their eyes again and forget about them/ I don’t want to be like that I don’t want to miss out on you speaking to me/ I don’t want to miss those moments bathed in glory/ oh Lord your love is so amazing/ I just want to share it with the whole wide world/ I know theres a lot of dirt in me but theres also A whole lot of treasure as well/ so you can get rid of the trash and the garbage inside of me/ you can forgive me the carnage ive caused The damage ive done to these innocent eyes/ I know you are the only one who can rescue me when I’m drowning/ you can stop me before I start to behave like an animal/ before I operate out of instinct and let my hormones control me not walking away when I get stirred up inside/ you help me to be stronger than I was before/ you show me a better way to be/ you point me to the right path but ultimately It’s my choice whether to take your advice to follow your orders or simply ignore them/ as if your commandments were ever mere suggestions If I only do the things that please myself what kind of Christian does that make me/ if I don’t have Christ in me im just a church attendee If I stick money in the collection plate but I don’t wait upon the Lord to speak to me/ I keep the pastors happy cos I keep them from going Broke but ultimately it serves no benefit to my soul/ and my destination is still hell unless I accept Jesus in my heart and turn it into heaven And it’s not as simple as saying a sinner’s prayer and living like the devil for the rest of my life cos ive got a guaranteed spot beyond those pearly gates/ oh no I don’t/ if I think that’s true im only fooling myself/ I’m held accountable before God for every idle word I say Every slip of the tongue I utter/ ever crass and unwise comment I make/ every single unwanted compliment I offer that focuses more on a Woman’s body than her brains/ especially when she doesn’t belong to me/ exclusively in situations when she’s just supposed to be my sister And nothing else besides/ I have to retire those old ways/ I have to crucify them and kill them whenever I feel that beast rising up in me again/ I have to cut off the head of the hydra/ I have to stop myself before it’s too late/ when I feel my feet sliding down to hades again Oh Lord help me I don’t want to die this way/ I can feel the weight of guilt on my conscience/ making my sisters uncomfortable around me It was never my intention to give them the creeps/ I want to be somebody they can trust and open up to instead of keeping their tears in a Bottle/ sometimes I have so many tears they can fill an ocean/ sometimes I wonder if she’s just too polite to tell me how she really feels Around me/ cos she doesn’t know me well enough not to know what I might do if she confronts me on the things that need changing in my life I never want her to feel like theres something she can’t say to me/ she can be brutally honest and I will still love her like she was stuck on me through flesh and blood not just this body of Christ/ I’m not going anywhere promise I’ll be her friend for life no matter what happens Between us/ no matter how far we go or how many obstacles we have to face before we stand before the altar and alter our lives forever Maybe I’ll go to heaven before that day comes what do you think/ you can see how much I stink when I’m ignoring my conscience And it only gets worse because the noise of this world silences out the gentle whispers of Jesus which is what I want to hear more than anything else/ why is it so hard/ I know if I listen to you speak that you will speak to me more/ that’s simple conversation maths Not too difficult to work out/ it’s not rocket science/ that when you put the two of us together and I’m more willing to listen to you That you will divulge more information to me/ you will share the secrets of the universe with me and you wont fade from my side so fast I’m being forced to make some difficult choices/ I have to say goodbye to some things I would rather indulge in to please my flesh I know you have something better for me hidden just around the corner/ I know you have something amazing for me better than the palace in oz/ better than that pretty emerald city/ more gorgeous even than the emerald isles/ the shamrocks blarney stone or rainbows Your love gives me greater wealth than limitless pots of gold/ I can’t express how much I need you/ when I’m depressed I reach out to you Why is it only when I’m desperate I learn what it means to appreciate you more/ why is it only when you take my regular chick away from me That I am able to find true peace/ why is it only in her absence that you are able to speak to me/ I know you were trying to infiltrate my head/ checking my spirit whispering are you sure you are doing the right thing/ shouldn’t you respect her why are you going so far with her I couldn’t always tell her to pull away/ though I knew it was wrong I just let it happen any way/ I should have screamed but I kept on going Like a cat licking cream when the sky starts snowing filled with a sense of urgency/ instead of visualizing the emergency situation I was in See my morals were in danger/ my coral was getting bleached/ I was blowing my witness in front of all these people passing along the riverbank/ I didn’t know how to make it right between her and me/ I was already too far gone to listen to the most reasonable voice speak There are ways you can express your love for her without tossing your morals off the edge of a cliff/ don’t you think she will love you more if You wait/ don’t you think she will love you more honestly and willingly if you didn’t push her into a relationship with your busy hands and eager lips/ wanting to crack off a piece of her like a block of chocolate/ yeah I knew I took advantage of her even if she was a willing participate/ she doesn’t belong to me totally until I slip that wedding ring on her finger so ive gotta be patient waiting for the arrival Of that magical day/ and what if it never comes I don’t even want to consider for one second that possibility/ one of us might develop icy toes again/ get a frost bitten nose and wind up the opposite of right as rain/ oh Lord won’t you stop us from trying to rush the process of our love It’s hard when we run out of things to say to each other/ so we think that getting more physical with each other will solve all our problems Plates on the wall , a few gates down the hall: I believe in unity/ I believe in community/ I believe you commune with me / I don’t need bread and wine to have fellowship with you almighty/ I don’t even need music when I can hear you singing to me/ in the beauty of creation/ in my heart and in my dreams In the stories of little kids full of wide eyed innocence/ in the way they scream in delight and play games of cops and robbers Cowboys and native americans/ Columbus was too far off course to stumble across true Indians/ but these days the diaspora has created That complex creature known as the indian American/ it bugs my foreign born parent yankee friends to have to say American and… These flowers will wilt eventually but for now theyre bright in bloom/ bringing beauty to the room with their wondrous perfume I could inhale it til the cows come home/ and that’s probably how long mum and dad are gonna take to get back from the movies I don’t have any time for groupies/ I’m too busy focused on trying to build my empire/ unlike my senior pastor I’ll admit it I want that fame but I want it for Jesus/ I want my name on everyone’s lips only because I want to be associated with my reason for breathing/ the Lord and savior of my life/ I want to see lives transformed by my cooperation and participation with His ministry I want to feel His words of life flowing through me bringing the dead to life/ bringing families into reconciliation with one another Being a catalyst for change in impossible situations/ being a willing vessel He can use to pour out His blessings on other people I don’t want to just waste my life waiting for my dreams come true I want to get out there and live them I want to put myself Out on a limb/ I want to push the envelope of public acceptability I want to do wild and crazy things exclusively for God’s kingdom I want to get people talking about that dude who knew no limits/ I’m not talking broken bones just putting my faith on clear exhibit Not being afraid to argue above the level of my intelligence/ not fearing the loss of my faith if I combat using my words as weapons with atheists/ not shying away from apologetics like a kid too disturbed by bleeding animals to pick up a gun even though he slices up his chicken When it’s on his plate in mutated unrecognizable headless beakless featherless clawless form/ after the blood is no longer pumping After the heart is no longer beating in its breast/ that’s when he feels safe calm and comfortable/ ready to deal with this destroyed life form Lying on his plate staring up at him/ with invisible eyes the head connected to the body still/ hearing their terror cries in his dreams The kid who works at the slaughterhouse/ the kid who saw one quarter of a mouse drop in his drink/ while other eyes ignored Boredom can be a funny thing/ it can lead you to moments of great inspiration or it can just waste your time as you dribble in a cup But you can guarantee somebody somewhere will eat it up/ if you cast your net wide enough to include the whole entire universe Your ruminations about toothpaste might be appealing to someone/ your focus on humdrum activity might be just the distraction someone needs To forget about the death in their family/ or the crippling disease that is killing them inside/ or the broken heart they own and wish they didn’t/ sharing is a home grown remedy that cures us of our woes/ don’t bury your misdemeanors in the soil along with that unbanked coin You could dig a hole through to china and still get nowhere with the one you love/ you could crawl right through its dirty darkness to the other side/ and still not manage to strike up a conversation/ with that sweet soul that makes you blush/ who makes your teeth chatter when she approaches/ cos you’re scared that if you actually get a chance to talk to her you might say something stupid/ or get the police after you For harassing and pursuing her/ even though all you did was try to reason with her/ that she doesn’t have to settle for a brutal monster It’s funny how some guys treat women like a piece of poop and they still see them like the sun shines out of their bum like their body is made of gold instead of aluminium/ I know I will only disappoint you if you get to know me better you will see my façade of intelligence is really a Cleverly assembled mask/ I could have been the one for her if only she had opened up the door of her heart/ I feel like Jesus does with us Knocking til His knuckles hurt/ waiting for us to open up and let Him inside our lives/ making them completely transformed in the blink of an eye/ I don’t have to deal with false accusations being thrown my way/ I don’t have to suffer humiliation or defeat like my parents did I don’t have to suffer potential abuse or loud angry violent protests/ just because I happened to have something poking its green head Over my side of the fence/ I will not be forgotten by Jesus/ though the ocean gets choppy and I feel like a teeny ant clinging to my leaf boat/ I hope there doesn’t come a day when the ones we love all fade away from us/ I hope we never wake up and realize theyre all gone Maybe I would appreciate my parents more if they disappear forever/ it’s funny how in silent moments I miss their voices interrupting my thoughts/ maybe I need their noisiness to feed my inspiration/ maybe it’s only when my brain’s fighting to escape from them/ maybe it’s only in that situation/ that I flourish/ that I thrive/ I know you can make magic happen without the aid of human company/ you are far more powerful than the greatest of wizards/ you don’t need to cast a spell to make the world come to life/ all you have to do is breathe And to appear by my side all that would be necessary for you to do would simply to show up in front of me without any introduction necessary/ I would know you are God by the fact you take up a space bigger than the universe can provide seating arrangements for/ moses saw you from behind/ the disciples witnessed you with their eyes in a significantly smaller form/ but shrinking yourself didn’t limit your ability to transform lives/ renew my mind/ get rid of the pollution in me/ you are the only solution/ to all this corruption corroding the innocence I found in you Relinquish these bonds from me Lord/ save me from this body of death/I wanted to distinguish myself for your kingdom before the flame of My life became extinguished completely/ don’t let me perish without knowing you with a deeper level of intimacy/ let me not take you for granted/ let me not take this responsibility lightly/ as my friends so often say/ it’s a privilege to have this opportunity to share with my Community of fellow believers/ the God who is living in me/ the difference He has made in me/ how He cured me of the indifference plague A plethora of options as an alternative to succumbing to my nightmares scorching touch: I believe this life was never intended to last forever in this mortal form anyway/ we have a criminal justice system set up in our society based on Christian principles so in the end the users and abusers have to pay/ but who is going to cry for the unborn child Who is gonna cry for the just born baby that is decimated/ who is gonna weep for the kid who no longer sleeps after being slain on its first day More babies have been destroyed in abortion aka murder than in all the wars of history combined with all the sickness and disease that naturally occurs in people’s lives/ when will this evil end/ it’s crazy isn’t it to think that a society built on Christian foundations can abandon its origins/ how we can read bible stories about the little children being destroyed in Egypt of ancient times and not see any comparison to our modern lives/ how far will we fall down this slippery slope before we wake up to ourselves and smell the blood on our hands and rotting flesh At least the world we live in hasn’t descended into cannibalism yet/ but babies lives are used to preserve the elderly’s frail decrepit bodies The sound of my knee knocking against the chair leg down below reminds me of a water pump from long ago/ I like seeing those clocks that run on h20/ they make me think about how precious our resources are that arrive from above and beneath the ground we tread upon right now I love the fact we can travel in our minds to places where our feet can’t go/ I hope I don’t get caught up treading wavecrests in the undertow Some people try to reach me and beseech me you need to change the way you act fool/ you’re getting too close to her peach trees I’m gonna toss you in the deep end of the swimming pool/ we fool around in the lagoon/ we make spooners up and tickle each others toes I’m gonna remember her every day for the rest of my life/ even if she never shows her pretty face around these parts again which I hope she does/ I’m not going anywhere in a hurry honey so you’d better get used to my face / I hope you will show me grace and in time forgive me But if you don’t that’s ok/ plenty of fish in the sea even though you’re the only one I want swimming alongside me/ in and outside my dreams/ I wake up screaming cos I know you’re gone/ I weep a pool at the side of my bed/ knowing I’m not running round your head But you’re doing a marathon’s worth of laps around mine/ did I cast my pearls before swine / did I simply waste my time on the wrong girl Maybe you will turn out to be the right one in the long run/ maybe you will wake up to the possibility that I’m right for you before it’s too Late for you to choose/ me as the one you die besides/ let me love you with all of my life/ let me use my energy on pleasing you alone We could have the time of our lives if only you would bother to just pick up the phone/ I feel a sense of urgency in me that won’t go away I don’t know what it is that drives me forwards/ I keep looking back in the city to check you are keeping pace in right behind me I like to see you up ahead so I don’t have to worry about your welfare/ I know there are creepier things than me lurking round these skyscrapers/ you haven’t seen the things I’ve seen/ you’re too young to experience the danger of talking to someone who might have evil intentions/ you don’t know how quickly somebody’s mood can turn from dark to light/ you think I’m the guilty party but you haven’t seen nothing yet/ if you think that you’ve discovered the ultimate criminal in my eyes/ they may still be under development in the laboratory Or they could have already passed through the annals of history/ preparing for the arrival of the beast , the prophet and the anti Christ We are living in the last days/ see how brightly you blaze/ you’re like a torch that lights up the sky and delights my eyes whenever you Appear right in front of them/ I know you are probably wiser than most/ you might have seen some things that could stun me into silence I don’t know about your potential for a traumatic past/ in some ways you have suffered more than me mentally and emotionally You have been on that rollercoaster ride when you think everything is going good then suddenly the world drops out from under you Everything you thought you knew for sure changes up on you suddenly/ the people you once trusted make you tense and insecure I know what it’s like to be forced to choose sides when your folks are fighting but I’ve never had to sleep under more than one roof called home/ cos they always kiss and make up whenever I feel like theyre just about to break up/ they believe in marriage for life not just til The money runs out and the bills pile up to your eyeballs/ that’s when folks start to get tribal/ his friends refuse to converse with hers And it takes a mighty God like mountain to bring them together/ to see a complete picture of harmony bliss and how this thing called their love works/ we don’t always get exactly what we want/ sometimes we disappoint each other when we want to create euphoria in each others minds/ sometimes we find that the best thing we can do is simply to walk away and let the one we love get on with their lives Maybe there was a time when you trusted men/ when you didn’t feel like you were only gonna get hurt again if you opened up so you kept Your heart hidden under lock and key for nobody to see/ perhaps you felt more comfortable with women cos you didn’t have the expectation From them of a potential romantic relationship/ you were just two sisters who had each other’s backs/ fighting against the world Crowding in on your head/ you know I could look out for you too/ you know I could be like that for you/ but maybe that ship already sailed Cos I’m sure you figured out that I’ve got affectionate feelings towards you/ I was never that good at burying my emotions in mud or sand They tend to float to the surface like feathers unlike the rocks of your emotions which you keep buried under the river where my eyes can’t reach/ you don’t have to run away from everybody else/ you have to believe me that I wasn’t intending to prey on you like a hungry wolf I just wanted to open you up and find out what was on your mind stop you hiding out where nobody can see you smile or frown So kick me out of town if you want to/ but I’ll be there if you ever want to talk/ so treat me like a clown you’d rather drown than see Walking down a street holding hands with you in my mind’s eye/ I wish I could juggle flaming chairs just to bring a laugh to your face I wish I could fetch a clock from a crocodile’s mouth without losing my arm just to see you embrace the possibility that the world is not always Going to disappoint you/ I guess I don’t know how to deal with it when you take an interest in me/ I shouldn’t have read too much into it The lights grow dim as my eyes begin to swim in yours: I can celebrate the fact that youre so close to me right now that we can almost touch each other if we just stretch out our hands Then our palms would be pressed together / but you wouldn’t want to do that would you/ you would rather stick a bullet through Your head/ like the way you do in pretend games you play/ when something makes you bored to tears or sick/ of the sight of it Could such a perfect body ever want to be a part of mine / to combine with mine to make another one on the most beautiful day Could you imagine the two of us floating high above the clouds/ I grow wings whenever you are in my vicinity oh sweet little dove Darkness closes in on my mind like a cloak/ I would rather choke myself to death with my own hands than live without you now I’m waiting for you to come around to the idea that maybe being with me wouldn’t be the worst concept you ever came up with I don’t know all the things you study/ I don’t know what it’s like to wrestle with the weighty concept that the ones who guide your life Won’t be around forever/ sitting at the table just across from you almost every night/ I know I’ve got it good and you’ve got it worse So why would I be able to relate to you/ cos I’ve seen those deadly silences where you can hear the sound of a pin drop too And I’ve experienced those loud storms where anger crashes on your peaceful shore and there’s no hole you can dig yourself into to escape There’s no hiding away beneath the waves/ and no matter how many books you read you can’t create a fantasy that doesn’t remind you Of the terrors you face outside your bedroom window/ when you have to share this space with the ones who claim to love you yet They weren’t thinking about you when they used their words like fists/ punching through the air/ sending fiery darts with their eyes Glaring at each other with no disguise of the hatred and malice inside of them/ I could build a palace for you where everything is perfect I could make believe it’s true/ I could drag you off with me in the desert/ like a dragon and you could sit on my back and we could fly Above the clouds so high/ we could travel at a snail’s pace cos you don’t have to get back anytime soon/ are you so desperate for authority Figures you’d do anything a dude says as long as he proves himself trustworthy and doesn’t look like he wants to get into your dance card Anytime soon/ I don’t know why it’s so difficult to face the music that says to me that I should have acted differently to the way I did I should have treated you like you were fragile/ I should have treated you like you were made of glass/ I can’t plead ignorant and pretend I didn’t know the facts/ I did my research/ I want to protect you from all the harm in the world including that which sits beneath my throat I didn’t mean to rock the boat/ I didn’t mean to make your afternoon so wretched and despicable you couldn’t look it in the face if you wanted to/ like God felt when He saw His son decked out in sin/ our terrible deeds hanging on Him/ making Him look putrid who cleanses us within/ with His loving blood/ I will never give up/ I won’t cease/ trying to set your mind at ease and pointing the way to peace within I know I have been down some dark alleyways/ I’ve acted more like the bully than the victim/ I always thought was the role I was born to play/ I wonder what went through your mind when you heard about joseph being pushed to put his precious gem of a wife to one side Because she was disrupting the harmonious flow of society/ when people get married before a baby appears out of nowhere right in front of them/ at least that’s how it would have appeared to him/ until the angel rocked up in his dream and told him go to Egypt be wise man It’s not easy to keep a smile on your face when your life is in mortal danger/ when all the little babies are being slaughtered just in case One of them happens to be the king of kings/ yet they were looking for the author of life in the wrong place and they finished up in disappointment/ why couldn’t their blind eyes see all the promises fulfilled in old testament prophecy by the arrival of Elohim Why did it take until His final breath for them to realize that He was the only one who could point them to the prize of salvation from the pit There was once a woman whose husbands kept dying but to have babies she kept trying until in failure they just decided to make her leader Cos there was no man to take her place/ maybe you could be like that bold lady that cut off the head of a king after lulling him to sleep with a milky drink/ it’s not every day God commands you to end a life/ we are living in new covenant days so now that only works in self defense And murder is still murder even if it’s justifiable so you still have to ask forgiveness even if the spilling of blood seems like the right path to take/ in order to save your family from destruction/ just like the princess that pleaded before the king to save her people from total annihilation/ when an evil servant of the king decided to stir up a hornet’s nest of trouble against her just because her uncle wouldn’t treat him like he was god incarnate or the best thing since sliced bread came on the market in a pita form in babylon’s cobbled corpse riddled streets If I was you I wouldn’t worry too much about the future/ you won’t necessarily repeat the patterns of your parents you aren’t cursed by dna You are softly spoken yet determined to shine brightly in life/ you won’t be pushed around you know when to rise up and stand your ground I can see so much of myself in your quirkiness/ though you got picked on you were bold as a lion sharing the love of Jesus with all and sundry You wouldn’t let your spirit be quenched by anyone/ you are fierce and strong you are a shining example to the older bedraggled rest of us You inspire us to be as on fire as you/ you make us want to follow in your footsteps/ you could be a leader to your people/ God is using you To be a bridge between people , cultures, subcultures and social groups/ you befriend the outcast you speak life into those treated with contempt/ you pour out God’s love into other’s lives and He pours it straight back into yours/ it’s crystal clear to my view you have a beautiful future in ministry on the horizon in front of you/ maybe you won’t hear this from me but somebody will eventually tell you You will get woken up to your destiny/ and people will flock to you like a bunch of sheep/ you don’t need fancy frocks to look awesome You look amazing and dazzling in the simplest of things/ you could make a pumpkin look like a coach/ it all depends on perspective and approach/ you could see potential for redemption in anyone you meet/ you can bring out the best in me/ hope I don’t cause the worst in you Desertion from normality causes a fatality deep enough to drown us both: Here is another enigma/ why would anyone compare a woman to a snake devil or spider when she is such a beautiful wonderful thing She is a mystery to me / I wish to know her history completely and utterly/ spare me no nitty gritty detail however boring you might Think it is/ each little scrap is fascinating tidbits to me/ I hunger for more of you/ the more I know the deeper I fall in love with you I can’t stop myself / I’ve tried but you keep popping up inside my mind the more I try to push you away from my visions and dreams It’s not every day you meet somebody who absolutely changes your life/ I know I’m not the kind of guy who makes you feel safe I’m more that dangerous kind of individual who proves to be wild and unpredictable/ but once you get to know me you will know I’m more likely to be a kitten than a tiger any day / I wish you could learn to trust me right now I don’t see any chance of that happening I know I messed up big time/ I tried to rush things/ such is the behavior of fools/ and gentlemen who hope to spend the rest of their days In jail an insane asylum or the poverty of loneliness / which no amount of riches can cure/ I could sleep on a million mattresses and still feel The pea lodged underneath my silken sheets/ could you be the one to love me every day for the rest of our lives/ could we pick flowers For all the hours of our existence/ take time to spot the lizards hiding in the garden on a sunny afternoon/ your eyes are better than mine Could I just float down the river with you until the sun no longer shines/ could we drift away into dreamworld as the seasons up and change Could you make believe for a little while that my smile is the only one you will ever want to see again/ and your family isn’t more important To you than me/ you have granted permission for me/ you have made things easier for me/ you have paved the way for me / to move on You have made things comfortable for me/ you have allowed me to let my hair down/ you have caused all the tension to flow instantly out my body/ my goose would be cooked if it wasn’t for you/ you made me relax you didn’t just let me stew/ you redirected my anger towards the Deceiver/ who tried to scupper our achievements/ you willing received me into your arms/ every time I called for you to be my dear one Don’t let me down now/ don’t give up on me so soon/ we could fly away from our troubles in a big beautiful balloon shaped like your island Don’t ever say goodbye again/ just hold me in your arms though rain increases and storms pelt us with welt like lashings of lightning Don’t be frightened my darling/ let me whisper in your ears/ all the love songs I have ever known/ no one can replace you on your throne Won’t you show me your true heart/ won’t you let me inside your mind/ won’t you help me understand you when communication becomes difficult/ what is the result/ when we take some time/ to get more deeply acquainted with each other/ I know you changed the picture I first painted of you in my mind/ it wasn’t exactly accurate/ I saw you through rose colored glasses now I appreciate your full true self And I can truly say I love you cos I know the wealth of all your loves and hates/ instead of only seeing a piece of the puzzle called you Didn’t we have it made in heaven/ the match we had/ lit like a forest by a dropped cigarette/ didn’t we have such a beautiful experience I must have been on drugs/ I couldn’t get this high when I was drunk/ I wouldn’t float like this on clouds of joy when I was alone It’s only with you that the world felt so magical and new/ lift me up above the weight of the world which I carry on my shoulders now Let me drop my saddlebags at that old rugged cross/ Lord don’t let me forget about her when other pretty faces blur my vision Lord don’t let me be such a wanderer when it comes to my affection/ these days seem more tragic without the stunning display of your beauty Like the cabbages we munched with our eyes like hungry caterpillars/ but only you could turn into a butterfly I was always just a worm Should I squirm away from you right now/ if you punch my lights out/ I can dream you came to my house and turned my world inside out Just like love and basketball we could have grown up together/ never realizing the precious treasure that was hidden in each other’s eyes You could have bounced yourself away from me on the other side of the world/ then I woke up to the possibility that maybe you were the one I was meant to be with all along/ I was just too dumb to realize until it was almost too late/ I picked up my pace and gave chase to you But still you flew off on that plane anyway/ I could feel the tension begin to escalate the more time that I spent with you my dear plum There are days I have to spend alone but I forget my God is always with me / and He is speaking to you just like He is talking to me The moon I see is the same moon you view at different times is my morning your afternoon/ you stir your spoon inside your cup of milo You hear me whisper down below or up above your dreamy bed/ you fly into mine when it’s valentines or on occasions when it’s just me in there/ let’s not be troubled by all our past mistakes/ let’s not allow the past to cause our resolve to crumble like wedding cake does If I get caught by the fuzz/ I will still promise you all my love/ if I get locked up and carted away my heart will travel with you Let the wool of time and yarns unravel/ as we dabble in the magic of this moment/ see the moon sinking in the water as we plan the face Of our son and daughter/ can we protect them from people like me/ do you see the monster or the child in my eyes/ do you see only Deviousness or the innocence I once possessed/ can you help me rediscover who it was I was made to be before I fell through a cloud of grace I didn’t mean to disgrace myself/ I didn’t plan on making an idiot out of this boy/ the one I see when I look in the mirror still Though the world sees old and grey/ past it when they look my way/ maybe I appear young and fresh but I’m really stale like moldy bread I guess I should chase after girls closer to my own age/ to keep the police away from me/ to stop concerned citizens giving me grief Do I care more about other’s opinions or yours/ as long as you love me then all the ships will come back to the shore with their load intact Do I have to carry this pain of never meant to be around inside of me forever and a day/ must I keep my heart frozen so you don’t make it melt/ whenever you approach me with a question or innocent comment/ I should see the purity and innocence in you and run a mile away But I don’t/ I just stay still as a stone/ stuck in the river by your feet/ so I weep in a heap/ a crumpled star held in your fist Bearing the weight of a brilliant mind and morals looser than wheels replaced by a braindead mechanic: It’s not enough to recognize your own inadequacies and moral discrepancies you have to actually be willing to put your money where your mouth is/ you can see the ones you love slip away suddenly faster than you can flick somebody behind the ear before they know what’s going on Remember when they used to paint women as fatter than they really were cos to have weight was seen as a glorious thing worth imitating They spoke of rodinesque women the more buxsome the better/ plumpness was honored as a virtue / thick thighs exonerated Don’t force yourself to behave in a manner befitting a woman who is considered to be publically acceptable by the majority of individuals The hour is upon us/ when we have to decide/ whether we want to continue deceiving ourselves or walk in truth and break the shackle of guilt I want to know why we keep on fooling ourselves / as if we didn’t leave our brains sitting on the shelves/ we rob ourselves of the wealth of our ancestors/ so what have we got left to share with our future descendants/ why do we keep pretending like we know everything when we’ve got a lifetime of growing up to do/ throwing up all the muck the world injected and deeply embedded inside of me/ still learning a different way to think/ all the riches of this world can be gone in the blink of an eye/ no sooner are you born than the time has come for you to die And some don’t even get that shot/ forget to listen to your oonscience and act like you came out the womb a mindless robot /With no will of their own/ are you an original thinker or just a clone/ is there a reason behind your flesh and bones other than just taking up space/ don’t let your life go to waste use your time wisely/ I stay focused on Jehovah so those demons don’t entice me/ try to treat folks nice though some see the way I act as nasty/ don’t show me no pleasantries/ treat me like a pheasant only fit for plucking presently Mentally preoccupied with garbage and my own internal carnage/ not making my own cabbage reputation polished and varnished to hide my savagery submerging that pesky varmint/ I can’t rinse the evil lurking round me with detergent/ need Jah to work on me be my heart surgeon Desperately seeking a less sinister side to myself/ take God’s word to heart don’t leave it sitting on the shelf/ know His truth fills my soul with wealth/ no longer walking in the shadows with stealth/ I could be undercover about the fact that I’m a Jesus lover maybe I would live longer/ if I wasn’t so insistent on being fire proof and heat resistant/ but I’m thinking of my future unsure of how much distance I possess between then and now/ with God’s help gaining ground/ this pressure keeps pounding my head feeding me stress hoping things work out for the best/ cardiac arrest/ birds nest in my hair/ darkness and despair/ chasing me everywhere I go/ gazing upon my homies with a thousand yard stare/ trying not to get my feet snagged stumbling in the devils snares/ attempting to tear my flesh away from this spiritual torment finding the task impossible/ wearing a mask for me is just not logical/ I could blame it on my biological make up / but I’m the one who chose to anaesthetize my spirit so it would never wake up/ I’m culpable yet capable of rising above this mess/ I brought upon myself when I chased after that foxy momma in a deliriously enticing dress/ I must admit I’ve got a lot to fess up/ throw my life before Jah’s mercy seat continually bless Him up/ I get it why my so called best homies are keeping their distance from me/ try not to act like a phony but my attempts wind up more fruitless than the market stalls at closing time/ when there’s nothing left to satisfy anything but the ravenous appetite of fruit flies/ who will pick just about anything/ happy with sloppy seconds so long as there is still some juiciness left in them/ I lost my freshness/ I became more stale as time passed me by/ like that crusty bread toasting on a sunny fence/ the pain of living without her is so intense/ I was a fool to doubt the impact off my deeds that brought a pungent stench to God’s nostrils instead of a sweet smelling incense I want to be that incandescent beam/ I draw comfort knowing God is always present with me/ this is prescient to see the necessity of God being present in my mentality/ taking up residence in every part of me/ now I’m in my element / got a memory like an elephant/ try to treat ladies more precious and elegant/ know egos are fragile they get busted up easily/ Lord help my thoughts from drifting towards sleazy streets/ yeah I’ve got a mean streak I hide it well outside of home/ drifting over the foam when I close my eyes and shut down my dome Conscious of the problems I cause others with my actions/ friends are like maths I keep adding and subtracting them/ reacting to my comments/ see how fast I lose and gain/ don’t want to remain that same old man using my brain for ungodly purposes that’s totally insane Now the son shines out of my life after the rain has finished falling/ you can hear my spirit calling/ Jah save it from a weevil mauling Sometimes I’m walking tall on other occasions I’m crawling/ on my hands and knees sprawling out spread-eagled on the mattress bawling My eyes out/ seal up the holes in the wall of my logic with grout/ climbing up the water spout/ too scared of her husband’s gun to have a shot at taking her daughter out/ maybe accidentally sidewinding with my go kart/ as far as intentionally harming her definitely I played no part/ still smarting from the last rebuke I was dealt/ wondering why all these honeys hunting for my pelt/ running helter skelter Lord give me shelter cos no woman alive in her right mind would provide it for me/ cos she knows I’m only gonna break her heart in the end like a battering Ram does a door/ wonder what I’m living for/ I only bring her more misery/ just concentrate on adoring my Lord and cutting up demons with my spiritual sword/ stashing up a horde of prophecies and promises/ all the things my good Lord told me through others building up my knowledge yes/ it does me no good unless I apply it/ I cant call it wisdom til I recant of my participation willing or otherwise in devilish schisms/ these God created organisms were intended for your praise alone/ we get a reception of stone cold silent when we attempt to transform hearts of stone into hearts of flesh/ we show tenderness to people who don’t appreciate it/ we get decimated by relationships/ then wonder how we find the strength to continue/ it must be a God thing cos I sure wouldn’t have it in me in and of my own strength/ we in the world not of it homie/ better recognize it/ we were called to stand out go the distance/ be peculiar people and live different/ I’m sorry you got it mixed up you got it twisted/ call yourself rebel denying the existence of the God who always existed /so why resist Him Technological complications ( folks biting folks styles and throats like punk copycat Alsatians ): I told myself that I Was capable of keeping the promises I made / to be faithful to you in my thought life/ to only pay attention to you and nobody else/ I don’t know why it’s so difficult for me to follow through/ on all the things I say and never do/ letting you fall through the roof/ know our roots go way down deep/ thoughts of you are troubling me messing with my sleep/ I cant believe that you would want to be mine/ have to rub my eyes to check that I’m not dreaming the day you decided to call me valentine/ feel like the cat who licked the cream With a cherry on top/ you make me merry nonstop/ whenever im with you it feels like im sitting on the top of the world/ life couldn’t get Any better than this/ please don’t say our love no longer exists/ im going through a transition right now/ I just want you to listen somehow I don’t know how I’m supposed to get through to you/ I just hope I do before I leave this life forever/ taking a ride on the holy ghost train Can you tell me why so many beauty queens just slip through my fingers/ it’s not like I treat them mean to keep them keen/ hanging on for more/ you’re the one that my heart will always adore/ now my heart is icy and no blowtorch of love can make it thaw/ settling old scores Nursing wounds and sores/ you say that I’m just gonna be like all those other dudes that came around before/ raising hell knocking at your door/ you’re still locked up in my thoughts/ you remain caught up in my brain/ I can’t abstain I can’t break these chains I can’t change The way I am/ please believe me when I say there’s nobody in my life but you and there never will be/ you were my little bilby in a trilby   ¶ 9:11 PM