too sleepy to get a life tired crazy cranky all at the same time happy in a stupid way time is ticking u two beautiful day playing from a stereo somewhere nearby there was shabbat upstairs sometimes i wish i could gouge out my eyes all in the name of purity and restoring national security today was a cool day there was lots of time to talk to people we went to a coffee shop and had potato wedges with sweet chili sauce and sour cream and ice blocks i had dream it was cool my brain is tired i had to practice with my band today malachi five in t he house i learned i had to stick to thirty words per verse it is all about making calculations of numbers of words inside my head it is a work in progress nothing is ever finished or complete my band does the music f irst then the lyrics later its all good keep on rolling baby tonight was fun we could play drums and shout and sing to the king of kings life is beautiful i like going to art galleries they give me lots of inspiration and help me to paint pictures with words it is probably too late to call mum and dad but i will try to call them in the morning i had better log on and log off before they pull the rug out from under me my eyes are sore i feel so sleepy i wish i could watch the princess bride it is a cool movie i dont know if i am any less uptight and outspoken than i was last year looks like i still have lots of learning to do my nose is dry my eyes are heavy it is a struggle to stay awake i am so glad that god gives me friends so that even if friends are not hunky dory we can still give god the glory praise the lord day and night everything will be alright i got all this itch i want to scratch but i cant let go when im holding on so tightly i am probably not supposed to be here last night i drank solo with frida and dunstan in the lounge it was fun the velcro on my watch refuses to stay down i got a frog in my throat that refuses to go away i hope that over the next seven months some people will want to come over my house for the weekend i would like it if people are able to come to the two churches i go to because it is very frustrating being a pastor and having church populations not going up or down but staying the same all the time god bless love zombie flesh the moon face one aka deep think aka daniel the wet fish that slippery slides down the wet lake into a slimy monolith mammoth my eyes are hazel my feet are bleeding and scratched i switched to sandals today because my feet could not handle shoes any longer i am tired of breathing toxic waste god bless love dan the man   ¶ 4:22 AM

  dear diary i want to go home on the weekend so i have to call my parents to let them know of my intentions i may or may not have other people come to stay over at my house it all depends if my friends are island hopping or not life is fun dreams will come when i close my eyes we had a big prayer session earlier we all did video messages for ken hestler the beach to bush people saw the princess bride last night we went to the art gallery yesterday there was an exhibition called story place it had lots of aboriginal art it was deeply moving there was a song by archie roach called bring them home about the stolen generation that touched my heart i saw balls with tribal legends and dreamtime stories on them paintings of aboriginal death in custody and some which were of indigenous country life in simple and complicated styles one was a story about a rainbow serpent who invites two boys in his mouth to spend the night and he eats them and the boys tribe throw him into the river and if people disobey the law they get eaten by the serpent there was etchings and video of traditional dance like mating dance for birds and mammals we watched a dean sherman video about relationships between girls and boys today last night i drank solo with frida and dunstan and we talked about solomon islands culture it was a cool time of fellowship i think my brain is slowing down it is a struggle for me to remain pure and not to associate with people who would lead me astray not mentioning any names i will not make any judgement calls if i have a plank in my own eye and pick on the speck in my sisters and brothers soon i will be downstairs i have nothing to do today we have lectures at two pm we have a lot of time to think about our lives i had fun yesterday we prayed in a buddhist temple donated by nepal and i fell asleep i read screwtape letters by cs lewis now i am reading screwtape prepares a toast i got some new books from the library here i have not bothered to go to the one down the road yet even though it is only a few blocks away i feel so dazed and confused i heard all this information last year but i was not really listening i am happy today life is good i am wearing sandals today i want to go to heaven when i die i am skipping lunch because i want more time to spend on my online journey i have a tendency to speak gibberish when i am tired and frustrated i have to pay my monthly internet fees it is now down to fifteen bucks a month with limitless hours providing there is plenty of free time i am happy today my ears are full of wax at the art gallery there was paintings from europe indigenous exhibit and the philipines when i went away from storyplace i thought all these portraits of kings and queens were howling at me i am running on empty burned out the oil in my lamp has run dry i am suffering from a severe mental block you would think if i give myself time i would have more to say my postbox hole is empty i guess this is a tactic to get me to come home but i love to see my parents i miss them every day it is weird when people talk of going home i cant relate because my home is only half an hour away i got a frog in my throat we talked about the difference between lust and love i spend a lot of time downstairs in the student lounge i had a dream last night that katie and ben got married i am wishing for the moon tonight i will eat at dinner time i hope that dunstan can come over on the weekend but if not maybe somebody else will i hope the beach to bush people all have a wonderful time on outreach noel sang heart of worship in dutch this morning i have an abundance of paper and pens just lying around waiting to be used i hope i dont fall behind on my assignments it is so easy to do i hope my leaders give me lots of grace i have to explain that i answered the questions then i lost the book they were in there is so much mess in my room that i could not find a single thing even if you paid me this is a beautiful day life is fun while people are happy and alive jesus loves you all god bless love zombiefleshthemoonfaceone aka daniel may all your days be filled with sunshine lollipops teddy bears and rainbows and may all your christmases be dark and lovely filled with candles and beautiful music playing on the radio i was born for a plan and a purpose today is the night of the living dead time is ticking dont know how much i have left i hope that all my friends will be at church when i am there i should have called my friends when i went home but i spent all my time watching television i will try to act differently next time i am not sure how much time i have left god is moving across the land people everyday need to watch and pray nobody listened to my suggestion in the worship session that the problem with todays youth in other words my generation is that morals have been replaced by opinion everyone was like thats interesting move on ignore the freaks ignorant suggestion these are modern times we live in these are lies i tell myself i take stone cold silence to be a lack of interest and make my own assumptions i make it up as i go along i feel so bitter and twisted i feel so cold and lonely sometimes i am far from god sometimes i am close to god i feel like im caught in the middle it is so hard to be me i live such a horrible existence i am a miserable worm who wriggles and squirms inside the apple of your eyes paralysed by truth and justice not able to have conversations without what i say being taken the wrong way happy days are here again i feel the pain of bugs in my brain the ants are in the sugar again i dont want to kill them i just want to make them go away must men be violent must angels be silent god speak to me tell me what you know i want to read a lot of books but the one i should be reading is the bible and i dont read the bible as often enough as i should i wish i was dead today lasts as long as god wants it to i am a two shirt guy you will never see me without two shirts unless i am lacking an extra layer to cover up my long hairy arms i hate myself and i want to die i am a fat and lazy slob i love my parents they are simply the best birds flying free from the nest it is best to always be prepared and i am a hypocrite because i say one thing and mean another i love my sisters and brothers in christ the sky is full of clouds today i am happy and sad at the same time i love to fall into the arms of angels when i am jumping off the cliff face i know i talk more than is humanly neccessary jesus loves you god bless peace on earth live long and prosper love zombiefleshthemoonfaceone  ¶ 7:00 PM

  questions and compliments these are the things that make girls mad at me i dont know how to placate them to tide things over mum and dad always said money cant buy you love and flattery will get you nowhere flattery just gives you flat batteries because you get exhausted from constantly dishing it out and never getting any love back but when i do get compliments i just ignore them and hope they will go away so i am essential a hypocrite with double standards but that is fine with me i am never going to change today and all this week we are learning how to hear the voice of god epiphany i cant hear gods voice unless i feel convicted of sin and unless i believe in god with my heart and not just my head that is why i felt so bad when i put kens dinner in the fridge last night because he wanted to rejoice with me over a new soul converted to christ and though i was happy i was secretly envious because the joy she had was the same as what i wanted it is so hard for me to fight lust and fleshy desires but that is no reason to give up i wish i was not such a slacker back to questions and compliments why do they drive girls up the wall how can i tell what women want it is better to compliment their minds than their bodies or clothing otherwise they think my motives are suspect they dont dress to impress guys they just wear what they think or know is cool and good looking apparently girls look at girls clothes more than guys do i can see beauty in faces i love hair and eyes lips nose ears and mouth the best of all the rest and also long legs and smooth tanned skin its all good in the hood i love girls but girls dont always love me because i am sleazy and i ask a lot of questions but i dont listen hard enough for the answers so they have to repeat themselves and it gets intensely frustrating because the truth is i dont care what they say i just want to keep them talking so i can keep on looking at them it is hard for me to relate to the opposite sex but i try my best i dreamed my sister went missing last night it was a horrible dream then i saw a female leader naked in my dream and i wanted to kill myself when i woke up so i will probably hide from all females today in case i say something i might regret and end up getting my head kicked in there is a fire spitting dragon in me i spit venom constantly i find it hard to pray i cant hear the voice of god god is not talking to me but still i read the bible and i try so hard to be a good boy but my mind wanders into all sorts of places that i dont want to go my excuse is that i am only human but as christians we are called to be different from the rest of the world it is a constant struggle for me not to be ruled by my emotions also i have a terrible habit of interrupting teachers with dumb comments and stupid questions two people have told me already yesterday and today tessa and josh both said to not have a bad spirit like i have demons or something and to keep my comments relevant why do i always have to think before i speak if i only say what god wants me to say then i would never speak at all and communication is essential in order to survive in the real world i cant just shut myself off completely i can zone out and not talk to people as easy as pie i hope i dont get in trouble for pursuing special relationships again the problem is i get too intense in my relationships then mentally i get taken over by ideas that are not from god i want to be pure and innocent but sometimes i feel that part of me died a long time ago god is my only hope i need to go to the moon and back i need to talk to girls like they are my sisters in christ i must phone my parents to make sure my sister is ok so i have no reason to fear i love my sister i wish i could treat ladies like i treat her well maybe not maybe i should talk to her more i feel guilty about that we only talk when we are watching television together i talk to my mum and dad but my sister and me really open up with each other we argue a lot but we always solve our differences it is a family trait to always want to have the last word i had better get back downstairs to get my moneys worth out of lectures god bless all you people in the world wide web jesus loves you and i love you the moon is made of cheese and missy elliot is the bomb mohammed ali is the greatest boxer of all time and i am the stinky cheese man love zombiefleshthemoonfaceone  ¶ 8:03 PM

  dear diary i am sorry it has been such a long time since i last talked to you i thought this would at least be a relationship i could be commited to talking to myself about my life i never get any emails i will make a concious effort to post blogs every day i swear from now on i will try my best to use my computer everyday in case anybody was wondering i still exist i have come back from the dead it has been eleven days since i last posted a blog i feel extremely guilty about it but maybe i should talk about what has been happening instead of constantly apologising methinks that would be a good idea last week we had ken hestler speak to us and it was the best week i got a free cd and we all prayed in circles on the last day we had good times he prophecised for everybody in the class we got him last week disco gets him next week god is good all the time i am making up for lost time it is hard to describe what happened last week i was told constantly that jesus loves me but i find that hard to accept even though i call myself a christian i struggle to believe in evidence of things not seen all we have to sustain us is faith hope and love i cleared the dishes but that is all i did to help maybe i will talk about today and work my way backwards this week we have a speaker called david way i am very happy that we have lots more disco students some of the girls are really cute and all the guys and girls are now my best friends i went to starbucks and gloria jeans i have been to lots of coffee shops lately i have food for the soul and food for the body i cant seem to fast anymore i am a big fat turd swimming in your toilet sometimes i feel so far from god i have to constantly be broken in god because i stupidly think i can fix my own problems and god has to humble me to show me where i am going wrong we were offered free websites but i said i got one already and i dont use this as often as i should but i will post blogs every day i must in god we trust all is well and good i have made a lot of new friends my best friends are sienna and abby but also i am friends with nikki and angelina and huan as well they are the people who i have gotten the closest to in the past few days i watched the clouds moving with abby it was a new experience usually i just watch stars i gave her some poems tacey and me give each other poems she is friends with justin i must make the distinction between friends and lovers i am so dazed and confused i must obey the ten commandments we have small groups tonight i am stressed because i did my five questions but i lost the book it was in sienna just gave me a noogie for all non australians reading my website a noogie is the act of scratching the head of another person be they male or female im sure you all know that i just love to waste time and i love dictionaries i want to come back in the next life as a dictionary abby says she wants to come back as a watermelon i said then you would be ripe and juicy and red and green and sweet and i would have to stick you on a shelf and call you my abbymelon i kind of like her but we are just good friends there is nothing going on beneath the surface i am denial incarnate why would i betray my true identity plus i took some time away from this thing not just because i am fat and lazy but i felt i had nothing to say and i needed a touch from god and time off so i could find healing and redemption but yes words is good therapy but there is nothing so cool as the power of prayer i wish i could talk to god i have realised recently that i am inadequate i am not a real christian i talk to god but god never talks back maybe i am just not listening well enough i gave tacey an encouragement note but i cant find abby to give her the acrostic i did her three songs one abbys song one under the sea and another one i did today i had lots of bread i scoffed the lot life is beautiful i love knives and forks and spoons people everywhere throw your hands in the air and wave them round like you just dont care i got in trouble with josh for interrupting the teacher and asking too many stupid questions but he gave snappy answers and i got picked on used as a model for all the dumb people he had met i was a satanist a larrakin a normal block and an old bum who needed praying for god bless love zombiefleshthemoonfaceone aka daniel the funky homosapien with apologies to del swollen members rules ok alright homies keep on rolling see you soon on the dark side of the moon got to go to class and cheat so i can pass and break up little bits of chocolate so i can get a glass and a half vomit in my bubble bath my best friend loves giraffees keep the faith love dan the man the black thunder from down under who chunders in this wonder world under the milky way galaxy jesus rules ok have a happy day i am the black sheep of the family fish and chips egg spoons and funny faces fulfil me   ¶ 8:01 PM

  dear diary today is a good day i woke up late and had a peanut butter and jam sandwich my practice yesterday was a shambles they dont want me in the band they dont like rap music they dont like my songs even when i do rock songs they want to replace me with other vocalists they only want to use me for freestyling between songs as if i am not part of the band just some freak who happens to be there and i am supposed to be happy with this i dont know what to do i thought it would be good to be in a band but not if i have to share the microphone with two other vocalists at least the other bands sing at the same time as each other they have it all worked out with three part harmonies but my band has so many ego trips and power struggles it is just chaos all the time i didnt mind at first but then i got steamed up because they hate my songs and they dont want to use them i know i should not let the sun go down still angry and i should not give the devil a foothold i just have to talk about my frustration i am not as mad now as i was yesterday today is saturday the eighteenth of october two thousand and three for anyone who cares i have not done this for a few days because i have been lazy i dont have an excuse i certainly didnt lack things to talk about it is good now that there is a cook who does vegetarian food there was a girl who wanted me to teach her how to rhyme it is easy all you have to do is go through the alphabet i always care more about call and response and keeping in time personally i hope my band stops hating me and realises that we need each other i know i cant play any instruments we already have a drummer dad thinks i should rap and play bongos at the same time but i think i would be concentrating more on the beats and less on the words they are just a means to an end anyway i sort of have a contingency plan i gave a girl named susan and a boy named ramon my phone number and a dude named joel and somebody else called steve last night we were trying to talk to him about god i was bought curry and coke last night was cool we went to xlr8 upload at brisbane city church i miss my samoan assemblies of god church at zilmere i must make every effort to go and see them next week or i will call them up and invite my pastors family over for dinner seeing as it is only two dollars per person it is well under budget plus i miss them heaps i dont know where i stand in the romance stakes at the moment that is a difficult department lets not go there shall we dance around the issues for a little bit longer i think my band is breaking up i have a girlfriend but i am lazy when it comes to staying in touch and keeping in contact i got tigist a card which says thinking of you and a dolphin bracelet but i still have to get stamps and go home and look at the love letters she sent me because i lost her address although i will never forget her name what she looked like and the wonderful hours we spent together in the heart of ethiopia this is a long cold day i wish i had more than shorts to cover my legs but beggars cant be choosers i have to take what i can get i hope my band lets me do more songs i dont care about sharing the microphone as long as i am allowed to sing instead of being pushed aside and told to sit in a corner and wait until i could be made more useful i thrive on my hatred it is the worst kind of inspiration at least my friend kate bought me a solo and made me feel better she told me not to give up not to be a quitter she had a breakthrough with god with her dance group they are all on fire for god and have new grooves with which to bust a move i have to go to rugby world cup today i wanted to get noah to confront my band but i couldnt find him earlier and then when i did i didnt have the guts to tell him so maybe i will before we go on stage we have to sort it out otherwise i will just be a face in the crowd i dont know why i came here if i dont get to perform and soak up the love of the audience i feel like my life is meaningless i try so hard and all for nothing nobody loves me everybody hates me think im going to eat worms i dont know what to do yesterday at practice time i just made ugly twisted rhymes all day long and i thought a lot about suicide but for me it never gets beyond contemplation because i am too scared of what lies beyond the other side of dawn i know i am going to the game today i hope they let me sing some songs if not i will cheer for the rugby teams and sit in stony silence watching my replacements and successors take my job away from me this is the thing i love to hate why do they want to bring outsiders in one guy is not even part of mad and the other dude is in another core and cant be at practice all the time and i can i get there early i come before everybody else and have to go back again countless times because of getting my wires crossed i am always the first to come and also the first to leave because they have no use for me so i just sit in the corner doing nothing like a good little vegetable rotting away with no use for a name i hate myself and i want to die i hate myself for hating my band for hating my songs and never using me enough why do they want other people to sing my songs why is my voice not good enough do i sound like a dead cat being fried on an electric fence what is wrong with me why cant i compete why am i not a leader why do i agree with people when they put me down i only add fuel to the fire some people are able to make me change my mind i refuse to be brainwashed i know what i think i dont want to leave my band they are going to have to kill me first i dont want to call it quits but if they keep on pushing me out of the picture then i am going to change cores because i feel so stupid and useless otherwise i made a lot of friends at church that was a good thing last time i just screamed for three hours straight because i hated the cover band i still wish they would play originals but i am resigned to the fact that covers get the crowds warmed up so they have to please their public i have to leave at one pm i am looking forward to tomorrow to infofest in the park there should be lots of things to see and do they gave us shirts which say the swarm i wish i was able to use lyrics on stage or freestyling my band hates rap but they love rock i am open to change i can do a variety of styles but people want to put me in a box rap and metal are not so much an odd couple as people like to think it can work if you want it to all things are possible for those who believe in jesus god bless love zombiefleshthemoonfaceone aka half breed aka outkast immortal   ¶ 4:02 PM

  dear diary this is practice week we are going to be singing at the rugby world cup we did some songs with luke we have three songs so far save our souls chocolate coated jesus and god is good also luke did fill me up we walked down to the park my lyrics were in my journal so i couldnt use them i am going to be online until i am told otherwise i want this entry to be deep and meaningful we had keish for lunch it feels good to eat again but my soul needs feeding i dont read the bible nearly as often as i should i hope that i can be useful today i am on dinner clean up tonight so i cant go to the church which has food and wine this life is good i have food stuck between my teeth i dont think i know exactly what to do with band practice at least i am being included some of the time breeze comes floating in the window i want to go to heaven when i die i want to make more god centered lyrics nobody takes me seriously sometimes i feel so inadequate as if i dont quite measure up i am willing and able to turn the tables i wish i could go to heaven when i die i woke up early this morning because steves alarm was going off i dont mind i like getting up early it is fun today was good in class we went through the lords prayer that jesus taught to his disciples i want to waste away rubbing the sleep out of my eyes i am tired of this world i dont know how much time i have left hard to think of what to say nothing really happened today i get frustrated when i feel my creativity is being stifled today was long and weary we got to sing a lot of songs i made some more lyrics i ended up making three chorus and one verse for the same song i love to wake up in the morning with a song in my heart i have an empty head i wish i was dead it is hard to convince people that i am able to write songs for me music is like a conversation with god it didnt always used to be that way which is why it hurts to be told that somebody else is needed to do the lyrics i do try to keep in time with the music if i want to talk all i can do is speak to the voices inside my head i had milo and tea before the meeting started and i must have fallen asleep because i was lying down on the floor i hope i get some time to talk about my life i am not sure if i will be able to stay awake all night long if i go to sleep at midnight that keeps the leaders happy maybe i should go to bed earlier i need lots of energy to survive these long practice sessions it is good that we always pray to god before we start but it is demoralising to be told that my stuff is not good enough which means i have to start over again i think it is like clash of the titans we have strong egos and dominant personalities everybody wants to have a go so they can get their fair share they all want a bigger piece of the pie i will not stay here long today i might come back after dinner unless something else is happening the thing is the computers always seem to be occupied when i have time to spare i think i will go to sport today if we are not practicing for malachi five that is the name of our band it was not decided by me i am reluctant to make decisions i let the others tell me what to do because they have more experience than me at these things the new girl came today she is from latvia my eyes are tired i am not sure how long i can last i want to make socially conscious lyrics but even then it is still a struggle to stand out from the pack i feel so tired and week it is not because im not eating maybe im just not getting enough sleep i dont know when we are going back to practice again i dont want to be on the computer for too long in case i get in trouble my nose is full of boogers i have a lot of time to kill i suppose i can always go back on the computer while everybody is busy at church my skin is itchy it is fun to know new words we had lots of cakes earlier time is ticking i dont know how much i have left life is good i wish i could suppress my feelings and desires but at least here i can let loose and tell people what i really think of them in a suitably vague way so they will never have to find out i am trying not to be too close to girls or to make them think the wrong thing about me just because of my past it takes a long time for the wounds to heal and it still hurts to admit that i was wrong there are beds all along the dorm and somebody put underwear on one toilet and an emergency tape which said in orange that this place has electric cables and skull and cross bones as a danger warning i hope i can finish reading the source today and rolling stone then i can read all the chronicles of narnia and screwtape letters series by cs lewis they are uplifting and inspirational books i am so tired i could drop dead right now i am weary of this world but i have got so much to live for the police told us to turn our sound down there was a bluegrass band in the park but we were the ones who got blamed because we are christian i think that is the reason today i woke up i rubbed the sleep out of my eyes i put on my clothes stuck my sock covered feet in my boots singing in the shower talking to myself mumbling and grumbling my belly rumbling chewing on the garlic bread that ramish got from eagle boys last night i had two slices but i might have some more later if there is any left janet is doing childrens church justin showed me his sun burned hands i am the only computer that is being used the mousemat next to me is peeling it is from a dogalogue home hardware catalogue they must have given them out to customers i wish i could be more sociable i dont seem to get along with people very well i dont think they like me much either i guess it works both ways love is a two way street i could have had seconds but i decided not too because i had heaps of bread at morning tea and lots of vegetables at dinner time because i was the only vegetarian last night we had small groups and we played a game where you have to say bib and bob with water in your mouth and we had tim tam slams and licorice and milo and coke and ramish got given some chinese food so he gave me some spoonfulls and it was five alarm chili hot we walked down to the shops and i was babbling about comics and cartoons i am so random because i run out of conversation quickly the trouble is i have to spend more time listening and less time talking life goes on with or without me my life dont make a difference i dont know when we are going to practice again but i know i will not be able to spend all day on the computer i dont feel wanted by my band i feel as if i am holding them back like i am stopping them from what they want to do musically blocking off their sonic progress but i am not a quitter i may have given up on everything else in my life but this mountain will not be moved i am not as strong as an ox but i am definitely as stubborn as a mule god bless love zombiefleshthemoonfaceone aka half breed alien from planet punk   ¶ 8:22 PM

  dear diary we had a long worship session today it was free worship it was a whole lot of fun there is a big hairy yellow thing that looks like a cross between a hornet and a daddy long legs time is ticking last night i read the source magazine apparently i am engaged in illegal activities by being here maybe i can have more diary time after dinner and small groups i am not sure if i will be able to do rap in my band i think they all want it to be mostly rock i am probably less enthusiastic than i could be i want to think positive thoughts next time i go surfing i will take a magazine with me so i know what to look up it is fun to find out about new music artists i wish i was going on outreach today looks like i have to wait a couple of months i want to be alive today we had a free worship session i feel so dead inside my brain is numb i have no thoughts in my head life goes on i must not be negative god is good all the time god bless love zombiefleshthemoonfaceone  ¶ 6:45 PM

  when fact becomes fiction outside my jurisdiction i am constantly the stuff of fiction subject to contradictions i keep on changing my mind making restrictions no access please be kind those knives in my back are hurting me so please pull the knives out take away my fear and doubt with accuracy ready aim fire i will give you what your heart desires you know this song is never ending into the background i am blending wondering who am i offending it does me no good unless i can rock the hood with the bang bang boogie come on down to my teddy bears picnic in the woods and i will steal all your toasted sandwiches covered in wounds and bandages can you feel my anguish let it languish a little longer not distinguished fire extinguished but there is still a fire inside of me aquire the fire at your meetings caught a fleeting glimpse of the shape of things to come because i dont know what to do with the rest of my life want to boogie with my rock steady crew i was cool as a cucumber wishing i was available to comment nothing but the rent maybe i cant see what the future holds try so hard to be good as gold break the mould jelly on a plate heaven can wait sit back relax and concentrate i was losing my sight losing my mind slowly but surely going blind enduring against all odds give me some assurance that i can be saved when i got lost count the cost i am a rebel with no cause drop my jaws when i see you coming like a shark on the beach and all the people are running away from me but life is peachy when you got sharp teeth and you can rip humans limb from limb when it comes to sink or swim i am a smooth criminal my beast is subliminal living under my skin i love to boogie woogie with you like doogie howser when the cows are coming home got bugs in my dome in my home across the foam sipping tea and sympathy come away with me and we can run in a field make daisy chains and across from us are those who remain in the lake of fire burning in hells depths i love your hair when it gets windswept let the machines do all the work so the people have time to think i need to stop and take a drink i am the missing link between life and death lost in the wilderness ghost of a chance for romance dancing in my grave think i cant be saved maybe i came too late to go out on a date do you believe in special relationships do you think we have a future together i love the way you walk in and out of my life so quickly so cylindrical and perpendicular i like girls with teeth who are anatomically correct baby i got beef i infect like an insect armed to the teeth i hate to give you grief this is what i know got stuck in the snow avalanches are coming all my shouting and screaming got me pinching my skin kind of think i must be dreaming to see somebody like you walk right up to me and talk as if i am a normal kind of human cant you see under my skin t he monster lurks within the evil unaware tie me to the electric chair cuz ive been twenty years on death row wigga hardcore with a jewfro they say hell is for heroes but i want to go to heaven when i die you can trigger me but never figure me out you can tease me you always please me i take the regular route make progress one step forwards is two steps back finally you and me can make contact black and white lovers tell me where the party at i want to pull a rabbit out of your hat perform magic tricks and your tongues of fire can lick my candle stick the clock tick tocks i was living in a box wearing white sox like i come from chicago live for the moment is my motto i keep the beats legato like fried green tomatoes at the whistlestop cafe im australian gday mate how you going think the sun is snowing im a naturalised citizen of the world bitten by the travel bug so i feel the need to get away from my problems it is not going to happen anytime soon vedging out on the couch dredging up from the swamp creature of the black lagoon mind bending spoons the same things i think the same drugs i drink eat sleep eat drink man woman and child women and children first get off this ghost ship i am putting your life in danger didnt your momma ever tell you not to talk to strangers under the influence of my friends and family think i am losing my grip on reality the rain comes and goes the water ebbs and floes in tsunamis rising with the tidal tornadoes so here we go and there you are dancing in the dark want to see you in the club im a magic lamp so give me a rub go full throttle with this genie in the bottle i will give you all your wishes if you clean and wipe my dishes look so tasty and delicious body chocolate i ate my fair share like a snowflake you are individual let me be the house husband do all the cooking and cleaning i love good clean fun when the day is done i gave my life to jesus christ when i was ten years old now i am twenty years young never been so bold the story of gods love is the greatest story ever told i fold like a paper napkin like origami printed on your apron kiss the cook take a look and see throw your arms around the world throw your arms round me i want to hold you tight day and night until the early morning light and you will never even put up a fight i want to hold your hand in the movies girl you are so groovy imagine you and me sipping ice cream smoothies i got a dirty mind that could use a vacuum cleaner just a little weiner on the microphone like a paddle steamer i am a day dreamer must be because none of my dreams come true got no time for walking with diamonds on the soles of my shoes but my goals are to please you feed you food make you big and groovy dark and lovely push me shove me stick me in the blender all money is legal tender play the star spangled banner hear my band yell if i was like sonic youth id be feedback smell im en vogue like dawn robinson in lucy pearl i love you crazy girl i want to rock your world i was talking on the telephone to my friends i feel so lonely why do i keep talking to answering machines please leave a message after the tone call you up after dark lets go walking in the park feeding the birds and hoping for something in return just makes me want to crash and burn you know what i will never be switch on the discovery channel and we can talk about real life just like the panel of experts have a little discussion in the intermission of our own attack of the clones nuclear fission soul decision what are you doing here where did you come from where are you going in such a hurry those drums sound like indian curry it makes my eyes blurry what me worry like alfred e neuman like mad comics i bank my burrs like truman show me the money honey what you gonna do can you believe in the power of love when push comes to shove i cant get enough you can bottle my rage let me out of my cage this is a race through time and space i will never be pink floyd i stink like a mink void the fur coated empty expanse of a souless machine enterprise bargaining agreements killing the middle man buying products directly from the people distributed through the body shop and oxfan all my friends and fam knows who i am i spend seven months at ywam try to cram for exams i never know how to pogo walk the dog like a yoyo can you hear me jeer me girl i want you near me my earwig covers the hairs at the back of your neck standing on end could you ever be friends with a spook like me the magic never ends im out of my tree if i freak you out just let me know listening to music is like dancing to techno i let go of your hand hold on to your picture in my mind i leave this world behind sick of the daily grind seek and you will find god bless love zombiefleshthemoonfaceone ps long live snoop doggy dogg white stripes kung fu movies ernie dingo eminem marcus gunsyndrome and the queen of sheebah   ¶ 12:32 AM

  dear diary i will talk about my weekend seeing as i have not posted any blogs for a few days i went home i watched lots of television programs i saw a pink floyd special for dark side of the moon we saw antwon fisher it is a moving tale starring denzel washington and derek smith he was raped and abused so he got angry at everybody until a psychologist helped him out i slept in my bed the first night i did not have any pillows so i laid my cushions side by side and they made a comfortable place to rest i watched a lot of trash tv i saw an episode of get smart where he was in trouble he had to pretend to be a double agent and steal the royal jewels from buckingham palace i watched a cartoon where the shoes came to life at night and one with horses set in the wild west and another of bugs bunny playing piano i was watching tv and reading the oath by frank peretti at the same time i also watched the simpsons it was the one where homer finds his long lost brother herb and ruins his car business by making a car that noone would ever possibly want today i went to the shops i got the source magazine two for the price of one some fizzy lollies rolling stone two pads one pen which is blue red black and green click ball point and two floppy disks and the australian and the courier mail i bought dream chocolate upstairs i have just enough left for laundry so i must be careful not to spend any more money ben lent me his cd player so i played trickys new album called vulnerable i met tacey and told her what i was listening to i bought tigist a thinking of you rose card i need to find her postcard i cant remember her address i need to get some stamps from the post office i will do that next week or ask my parents for a loaner as long as i am not giving her money they have no reason to object i paid trevor the money i owed him for curry at ramish house i went to church but nobody was there my guess is that it was a combine service i sat down on the grass for a couple of hours and heard lots of old school pop songs and some new ones like someday by nickleback im a believer by the monkees wake up sleepy jean and thats all that registered in my brain i read first and second samuel on the weekend there is a lot of time to kill on trains i will check out the top ten blogs today if there is enough time it feels good to take some time away i am lucky that i got to go home on the weekend but i probably wont be able to go back until rugby world cup is over i feel guilty for all those people that have been expecting new blogs and all you get is nothing but here i am and maybe because i had some time off now i have something to say i was so sad on the weekend about getting into trouble for special relationships i dont want to think about it i will just make heaps of love songs for tigist and think about her because she rocks my world and it is best to focus my attention overseas rather than getting into trouble down under that makes some kind of logical sense i went hell for leather when i came off my fast today i kept chowing down bread and apples on morning tea it is just as well i took a walk and got some exercise at lunchtime at least if i eat dinner i will know when to clean up the plates my sister is doing fine at her new job as a beauty therapist she always was but now she is at a place that specialises in her field of dreams life is good we had to do mad monday today i have been away for a long time i promise it wont happen again it was not my intention i caught up with emailing my friends because i only know how to use email from my house it is funny to think of all the people who used to be here last year it seems all my friends are overseas while my friends are here i will make the most of their presence and try not to take them for granted i hope we get time for band practice today i brought all my cds in my pillow case i am going to make a scrapbook for kate i will take lots of photos and do some pictures and make it interesting i will need to get a film for my camera i should have brought my camera with me maybe i can ask mum and dad if they will bring it and put a film in it for me i told them about my website but maybe it is too controversial for their taste mum doesnt like anything to do with zombies dad did a sermon on the melchizadek priesthood i should mention that after i signed off last time we had drum lessons that same day with a drummer from barbados named george we are going to a festival in mitchelton park i think it is next week but i am none too sure it is funny how people from the west indies sound like they come from england or london at least there are trains outside rushing through the station i want to go to the prayer group on thursday but i keep on spending my money too early i want to get my leaders norweigan cd i will next week but this week i wanted to go to the shops to prove to mum that i do more than just sit around and chat chew the fat which is true i drink so much coffee and i never get my books read because i like to be surrounded by people it is the feeling of being alone with everybody that really bites my cheese when you dont have to talk you can just listen to the hum of conversation buzzing like bees around your head i pick and flick i dont pick my nose and eat it but it is still a disgusting habit i hope i can get my vegetarian meal from the cooler later on tonight i must try not to eat too much food when i am coming off my fast i had a big fat breakfast made by mum with mushrooms and scrambled eggs and toast and many cups of tea we had raspberry tea there was a show about pop music on last night i forget what it was called i hate it that my thoughts are all messed up like a radio that refuses to work i cant tune in the cd player it never works for me i lost my train of thought it went some place i cant come back from i am happy today there are plenty of options i saw my chickens they are growing bigger my sister suspects one of them to be a rooster in hens clothing because we saw a little crest but that is an occasional glitch in the matrix of chicken dna apparently that kind of thing happens sometimes dad asked if i want to do the gardening and i said no i actually did want to water the garden but i was afraid i would have to pull up weeds and even though i am a green thumb i am too much of a wimp to get my hands dirty unless i have a rusty nail to pick the dirt out from under my fingers which is how my big toe got swollen and infected i wish i had a tree house i wish i could buy all the simpsons and futurama comics why are the best comics always the most expensive why do i have to cross the road to get to the newsagents these are hardly deep and meaningful questions but it is important to me if i had my bike here i could go places a whole lot faster i am only going to do this for ten minutes more i have already run out of things to say if i had my camera i would take lots of pictures of all the people who are here in this place i love my friends and family but i hardly ever see them i hope i can get my band on video camera at the rugby world cup because we sing before the games so they dont show it on television so people at home dont get to watch it only people in the stands our family played a game of scrabble and my sister won but i helped her i originally wanted to play monopoly but my mum and dad wanted to give up at eight and i hate games that finish before they are well and truly over looks like i might have to go soon i like going in new shops or old ones which i just have not bothered to visit yet it seems places of business dont last long round here if tupac had a child with counting crows you would get a weird freak like me i dont know what to call my style i have enough money to wash my clothes when they get dirty again i took my clothes home to wash and came back with some more shirts to spice up my life and add variety to my day i wonder who will be teaching us this week im looking forward to going to the art meuseum and picking a random person to do an interview with on the day when they dump us in the city i must try to call my friends more often i hope my wallet is in the lost and found box i need it for my medicare card which gets me cheap drugs my homelink number which gets me free calls and my disability pension card which gets me cheap train tickets there are benefits to being socially inept and virtually brain dead these are the perks of a walking talking idiot box i would like to visit the library but i am afraid of getting lost so i stick to the one on base my plan is to only go there when i have read all the books that are already here i wish i could seperate my shadow from my skin today is monday the thirteenth of october 2003 for anyone who cares is there anybody out there peace out god bless love zombiefleshthemoonfaceone rebel in arms devil in a blue dress   ¶ 10:00 PM

  dear diary i promise todays entry will be more coherent even if i have nothing to say last night i got in trouble for pursuing special relationships when i did not think i was doing that i am trying my hardest not to give people too much attention so they dont misconstrue what i am trying to do i just want to be friends with girls i dont want my life to be messed up last year i got in trouble constantly for giving girls love letters i have to stop doing that this year i should keep conversation to a minimum or dont ask people personal questions just stick to music that is always a safe topic it is personal but at the same time music relates to everyone i apologise to anyone who expects coherent sentence structure and logical thought patterns you are not going to get that from me my memory is all screwed up so i will make this blog entry very open and honest there is this girl called kate who has been abused in the past so maybe she thinks i am like those other guys but that is simply not true i dont want to think about it i want to talk about good things ben made me some coffee that is a good thing he said i could take it so i hope he doesnt mind me taking it at my own liberty i dont know how to relate to girls i dont know how to just be friends i am a typical misogynistic male chauvinist pig all men are liars i hate being a boy but i dont want to be a girl either i feel like an alien like i dont belong on this planet anymore when i fall in love and i dont get love back it makes me want to die i want to slit my wrists jump off a bridge or pass my learners and die in a car accident sorry for being so dark and morbid the things i feel are strange like i feel like im cheating when i talk to other people or it makes me feel good or i get a funny feeling inside my heart then i think it must be love i want a girl with a beautiful mind and a beautiful body is that so much to ask i know there are hot girls who are intelligent there must be i have met them before if i keep my thoughts inside my head and dont speak them aloud then they are safe and well i want to kill myself i hate it that i cant go seven months without giving girls love letters i must not chase the girls that is always my problem this is going to be a very godless blog but i feel i have been closer to god since i started fasting but i didnt read enough of the bible i am going to read first and second samuel on the weekend and also the oath by frank perretti and the screwtape letters and screwtape prepares a toast by cs lewis if i get enough time i will keep my entry short and sweet today because i dont want to be angry all day long making diary entries is good therapy when i am mad because i cant relate to girls and i want to just be friends but i dont know how to just shut my mouth so that i only say what is neccessary and not spill the beans and go too far and get in everybodys face this is the same mistake i made last year i havent learned only this time former students have become leaders and they are telling me what to do which is perfectly fine but i didnt want to come out my room last night and face the world i wrote a sorry letter but i will not give it to her because it will probably blow up in my face i wont give her any more letters i dont want to hurt her feelings i dont want her to hate me i just want to be friends i hate myself and i want to die i will stay away from girls i will only talk about the weather and say good morning or good evening or how was your day stick to generic topics however frustrated it makes me my shoulder blades are aching i sat down at my chair leoski had milo with his cereal i think i will try that novel approach when i come off my fast think about good things think about godly things dont think about girls all the time god put us in a unisex environment to help us get along with the opposite sex usually girls dont want to talk with me except for girls at church i hope i can patch things up with roxy i hope we can go to the movies again i should go to church more often i wish she was not at university this is a difficult time in my life i got hiroko a dolphin necklace i wanted to get a dolphin card but i didnt i got a frisbee and a pack of cards instead maybe i will go shopping and get her some gummy bears i wont try to give anything out to girls except for girls at church because that is a safe place this is not because there are leaders and students can dob on me and my pastor doesnt mind if i have girlfriends but my leaders do so am i just working round the system am i supposed to be single for the rest of my life i am not able to just back off i will bury myself in books and never look up again i will read the bible every day i want to be a better christian i dont know what is happening with tigist i guess we can stay in touch with letters but i hope she sends me some photos if i give her money for a camera i keep on forgetting my problem is short term memory loss i never forget birthdays i just miss out names god bless love zombiefleshthemoonfaceone ps happiness is a warm gun   ¶ 4:02 PM

  i hope my parents will let me use the internet when i am at their place we had a cool day today we had small groups and we talked about our childhoods like coldest memory warmest memory all kinds of weird stuff it hurts to smile my lips crack up i have a spot on my bum that is irritating also i wish it would go away because it hurts to sit down but my complaints are nothing compared to those who are less fortunate than me we had to pray for india this morning i wanted to go to india after africa because i met a dude who promised me i would have food and shelter if i just came to help him with street evangelism but that was before i met a girl in ethiopia love changes everything i hope i dont get in trouble thanks to gods saving grace my email did not work or else i would probably be in deep trouble god is good all the time i am human life is fun today we sat down in class it was fun i had small groups in my group is tessa mark kate mary josh erica trevor and me i am human after all life goes on long after i am dead and done i wish i was dead i am not sure what to do with the rest of my life today i woke up at a normal time i go to bed late but i wake up early i dont know how that happens my lips are cracked and dry i need lip smackers like a hole in the head i am going off the hinges we talked about our lives in small groups it was interesting and informative i hope i dont get in trouble i am trying to keep my nose clean i am happy when other people are happy i wish i could go to heaven when i die i have to match faith with works i am happy the light is shining the skies are very blue today i am hopeless when it comes to relationships with members of the opposite sex but hopefully with gods help i can turn that around i am going home on the weekend i hope i get to go shopping today was long and hard i am weary of this world i am tired from lack of sleep and lack of food but my parents will probably make me eat on the weekend if i hold out until sunday i can make it an honest week i hope that jesus comes back soon i want to be good but life is hard i am hungry for gods word i wish i was human i want to be happy but sometimes i feel sad when the world goes wrong i like to make people happy i am on a mission to avoid repetition i want to go to another planet blast off into outer space on a bottle rocket i am happy go lucky i wander down the road i wish i was human i feel like an alien sometimes i want to be an artist we have to practice at two pm there is going to be drum lessons in ten minutes time i want to go to heaven when i die i believe in a right to life to free souls from trouble and strife only god can save your sins only jesus can help you out when you feel down in the dumps i hope that i can believe in god i hope that i can help other people become christians i wish i was good but sometimes i am a bad boy not always intentionally i am hungry for gods word fasting makes me more aware of the contents of the bible i am surrounded by people on all sides i wish i was human i am looking outside and seeing clouds through the blinds wish i could leave this world behind if i had more time i will look at blogs i will on the weekend i want to go back home on the weekend i am happy go lucky i was a little boy a stupid kid we learned today that fines must be paid if the fire exit door is blocked off by tables i want to be happy i am stuck in the muck strike a match to see what is in front of you in a dark night my thoughts are all over the place because i have a conversation while posting my blog so if i repeat myself that is the reason why i fall in love with people too easily i fall in and out of love all the time i want to be spiritual god is a wonderful being father son and holy spirit i believe in the trinity i believe in gods divinity i believe in a perfect world but happiness never lasts and i cant stop living in the past i want to go to heaven when i die i am knocking on heavens door i am wandering and wondering pondering the meaning of life full of trouble and strife try to make my life right future looking bright wish i could see what the future holds try to be good as gold but i dont know how to break the mould i am happy no matter what happens life goes on god bless love zombiefleshthemoonfaceone  ¶ 7:57 PM

  dear diary my plan is to do this until i am tired and exhausted and i have nothing left to say this is a bad place to start i have to get as many email addresses for beach to bush and sports dts before they go away because some of them i will never see again except for impact summer and their going away parties we heard some more testimonies today we are down to the last legs it is cool to hear people talk about their lives there is clapping going on outside i tried some orange and ginger tea today but at the moment i am drinking the normal kind whatever passes for normal these days today i plan to look at the top ten blogs after i have posted my entry that is the highlight of my day seeing what other people say about their lives i have not got any hits yet maybe i should post my home email address as an alternative just in case people want to try that in case hotmail is not working it is wiseinxs@powerup.com and the other one is zombiefleshthemoonfaceone@hotmail.com i just realise i wasted too much space there so now i am having to make up for it but maybe i think if people dont make it all the way through my entry today they will be able to know very important information before they fall asleep and dont have time to finish what they started it would be nice to know that people are reading my stuff that i am not just doing this for me myself and i but i told my family and friends about it and if they check it out then it is worthwhile i dont have the ability to make secure entries that are not available for the general public so all you virtual diary junkies should feel privileged because i am laying bare my life however lame and egocentric i get and i just realise i have wasted half a blog on talking about blogging which is just crazy i felt good to get props from jason about my rapping because sometimes i feel my poetry is woefully inadequate and i suck at making titles for my poems i hear about these arabian poets called sufis who wear sheep skin cloths called sufis and make poems which have numbers as titles i am not too sure of the stanza structure however in africa poets are called griots and they start teenage riots with people hungry for rhymes i love call and response music i am going to buy a norweigan worship music cd when i get the translation to the lyrics here is my guilty little secret last night i borrowed a cd played without permission and i was playing payable on death on mp3 player mode maybe i will ask if i can later on today trouble is i never seem to get time to do all the things i want to do it is so easy to waste time when there is more likelihood of people coming along then i will high tail it out of here at the moment steve is talking on the phone but i will get off at one pm unless anybody has any objections good then i will spend what remains of my time talking about my life i feel so self indulgent i drink heaps of tea it feels weird fasting because i am not a spiritual person by any means i call myself a christian but i am more likely a hypocrite i dont know what to do with my life i am glad that my blogs are up to date now and saying the day i post instead of the day before praise the lord the bug got fixed in the computer i played frisbee yesterday i live my life through the past because i can never remember the present it was cool when tessa did her testimony because she had a timeline with lots of chinese words many people have cool stories to tell lots of them grew up in gang culture or had deprived lives i feel so selfish and callous because i have such an easy life it is a total flatline nothing ever happens to me i went to africa last year that was probably the highlight of my existence like the moment when i said to myself it cant get any better than this i hope that everybody out there is having a happy day i like making new friends i dont know what i want to be when i grow up even though im a little bit older i still dont feel any more mature i am constantly insecure about my rapping because it is so eclectic and i neglect to mention those who got me here in the first place i love my family heaps i am excited to be seeing them on the weekends because i miss them a lot i wish i was back home sometimes but mostly i like it here the people are nice enough and the pieces of the puzzle are falling into place so i dont have to wear a muzzle no more it is good to have the freedom to be able to rap when i want or when people need some words to go with a beat i still have a long way to go before i am as good as my buddy mike on straddy this funky fulla with mad didgeridoo and beatbox skills but at least i can always dream i wish i was tricky he is the best rapper in the universe i hope i get to see his band when he comes to aussie land this country is upside down we walk on peoples heads is that a good feeling i dont know i never seem to find the time to do all the things i want to do god is moving in my life i am feeling spiritual changes beginning to happen mental health update i feel a lot less sicker than i did yesterday but i still have bouts of tiredness the important thing is to have constant liquid flowing down my gullet like a stunned mullet last night i played cards and heard mark tell his testimony to lucy talking gossip folks like missy elliot my funk im yelling it rebelling against real politik i dont fit in maybe i can begin all over again start from scratch these plans i hatch like a belly itcher the poor get poorer and the rich get richer digging ditches living by the side of the road taking out the trash do the monster mash i see my life flash before my eyes want to wake up in paradise i feel paralysed unable to change others situations though i wish i could help them and it feels so hard not to be able to offer assistance even though i am more than willing to go the distance time im killing sound bombing the songs to get the party people dancing all night long i feel a change in me there is no constancy i want to see concerts and bands so much i will never understand my life is in gods hands taking care of me every day when i watch and pray i get answers in subtle ways that are not always obvious i was used to being ignored take a guided tour settle old scores ignore the facts and figures pull the trigger on me tell me what do you see so many people looking at me i choke on the mike my drink got spiked dont know what to say just mumble humble pie stutter fly butter fly poke in the eye dont try to analyse me you will never get to the bottom of the barrel singing christmas carols at the wrong time of year spiders from mars grinning from ear to ear steer clear pop tarts reproduce the side effect of broken hearts i was born twenty years ago refuse to go with the flow tell me what you know i am what i am and that is what i will always be loving the lord but failing in consistency so hard to be sincere close my eyes and disappear i have to mean what i say i yearn to be no longer ignored making up too many mixed metaphors which could be taken one way or the other see what you can discover when you look beneath the surface to the place in your heart where everything is perfect in the middle of nowhere which path do you choose to take on the road of life i make a big mistake always falling in and out of love when push comes to shove and i cant get enough maybe i need to be given a good talking to walk me through the steps part of the process i lost my heart to a girl long ago now i cant get it back for all the money in the world it is a strange situation i found myself in when i am hooked on love and letter writing she is so much better at tender loving care i am aware of the world out there i declare my ignorance of relationships what it takes to make it work because for play you have to not be a jerk and be commited for the long term not a one night stand or a rinse out perm you got to be a worm in the stomach stick around to see what you can find out take away my fear and doubt god is good all the time that is the reason why i am busting rhymes for the sake of salvation of the youth of the nation even if i am a hypocrite too legit to quit your guess is as good as mine art night cheese and wine miss the date dont be late god is in the house jesus christ living sacrifice make me more like you lord i lay down my sword swim in the river of love i never want to lose control give you my all god you are my guide through this life take a walk on the wild side dream away trouble and strife got kids and wife and it feels good to rap in my hood for my samoan peeps i am in too deep sweep me under the carpet i close my eyes and forget in the end im just a maggot god bless love zombiefleshthemoonfaceone   ¶ 8:01 PM

  dear diary earlier i made the mistake of thinking the computers were not working when really they were simply going slow so i missed out on time i could have spent here earlier but now i am going to make out for lost time we heard lots of testimonies today it is good hearing about peoples lives i went down to the park to use my frisbee but there was already a game of frisbee ball going on i made a burger for ramish i told him i would make a coffee for him after nine i filled up kates water bottle for her i had red cordial and yellow cordial i worked up a sweat playing frisbee i talked to lots of people today i drank milo and tea i am not feeling very original it is good to get time to post blogs while people are busy munching and crunching i decided to fast for a week instead of forty days and forty nights i dont know how i will explain to my parents that i am not eating they will probably make me eat food so i guess i can safely say my fast will last til saturday and then only a full week by the power of persuasion i didnt ask for permission because i didnt want to get any of the leaders in trouble the cooks dont seem to understand t hey put meals in the cooler for me but i am not going to eat them i will have to ask for permission to go home there is a likelihood that i will have to stay on base at least until the rugby world cup is over because we are going to be singing there maybe i can have my parents come for dinner then at least i would get to see them again i would also like to see my samoan peeps even if i cant come to church i can still invite them over for a meal i have to send letters to all my friends overseas i wish i did this earlier i feel drained of energy right now i am not up to my usual speed so sorry all those people who want a long post i cant help it my brain is dead today i keep falling asleep in class i lack the energy i need more coffee less milo even if it makes me puke at least it keeps me awake which is very important i did nothing during break time i did rapping while jason did drumming i made up animals to go with everybody who is doing mad so i can turn my friends into a fantasy story i think we will probably have testimonies all week because they go a lot longer than you would expect them too i must not let jealousy eat me alive i know there are better rappers than me the best i can do is just to stay eclectic and not lose sight of my goals looks as if i will have to get off soon seeing as dinner has finished and more people want to use the net i woke up at six thirty and i was singing in the shower and i got told off some people are learning to drive my parents had a lovely holiday in tasmania they saw rainbows in the rainforest and walked on a bridge over some trees i hope they dont mind me talking about them i will have to find out if it is neccessary to stay on base or if i am able to go home my life is pointless i picked up rubbish in the park whatever was left lying around no doubt i am taking up more time than is neccessary my brain is too fried to use any search engines i will pay respect to my fellow bloggers tomorrow i am going to spend the next ten minutes talking about all the things that happened today and revisiting the past in search of inspiration i have itchy arms they are stinging and covered in spots possibly mosquito bites i am looking out the window it is cool to hear peoples life stories even if people have really tough lives it seems near death experiences traumatic pasts and being used and abused can make people more aware of gods love when it is shown towards them you probably would have gathered by now that my spelling and punctuation leaves a lot to be desires but my eclecticism is second to none i may not be original but i know how to mentally cut and paste i sat downstairs with my head in my hands i made a lot of songs today maybe i will post some online tomorrow if i am feeling better i have a headache at the moment and i am dog tired i am almost falling asleep as i write this my brain is slowing down i enjoy the tranquil melodies of telephones i know i am sleepy when i have to look at the keyboard to see what letters i am using to type the words which appear on screen such a lame observation has never been done before i like getting encouragement notes it feels good to have your spirits picked up by acts of kindness i never have any email probably because i only send it out sporadically maybe i will try to find out the email addresses of people who live here so i have more people to talk to i am happy today this is a good life i walked round in circles down at the park kind of like i am doing now inside my mind if there are people gathering in numbers then it is time for me to make haste and beat a quick exit for the door i am only human after all i went to kurwongbah state school then bray park state school then northside christian college i am not fond of being educated or manipulated i like to be naked but not in a room full of people life goes on my mum doesnt like it that i have an obsession with zombies i am trying to change i just like horror movies because they are fun to laugh at i never take them seriously except if i am watching late at night with spooky music playing in the background and there is a mass murderer on the loose i miss watching television i hope i can watch big daddy on the weekend i hope i can think of some songs before i have to sing at rugby world cup that is my biggest fear it is so hard for me to remember lyrics i just read words off a sheet it is better if i can remember them or freestyle or palm cards i could do songs if i have the chorus on my hand and then i make up the verses but i will have to think on my feet jesus loves all the children of the world even if they are freaks like me god bless love zombiefleshthemoonfaceone stay cool dont drink and drive be good to your mum and dad you dont know how long they will be around to comfort you in your time of need i never want to go back to england i love my life i love my death jesus loves you be a fool for love god bless peace out from daniel smiles all round   ¶ 2:01 AM

  today we sat in a room and talked about our lives it was a time for testimonies i hope i can do mine after lunch it is hard for me to just sit and not do anything with my hands but it is good so i can concentrate on what people are saying we played a funny focus shift game where we had to ask questions and not make statements i have moisturiser all over my fingers because i couldnt find any soap and i had to use the unisex bathroom because i couldnt find the boys toilets fast enough i woke up with a smile on my face we had devotional groups in the morning my team is mary kate steve noah lauren and me i am addicted to computers my head is empty i heard so many interesting stories today i hear drumming outside the window we do a lot of talking in class but this time it was legal i got a postcard from mum and dad in tasmania i will try to call them sometime between now and when we start class again or i will call them at night just in case they are out selling books i tried to call them twice when they were down south but all i got was the answering machine but it was nice to talk to my sister on the weekend it is strange how people always sound different on the phone friends say i sound like my mum i find that assumption kind of scary i am not mum or dad i am my own person as freaky as i am and as weird as that seems life goes on i hope my girlfriend has fun in computer class and that she learns quickly this life is weird i am just an average trailer park trash boy in the corner of the room thinking thoughts of gloom and doom i dont know what to do with the rest of today i made a rap tape for my friend kate i hope she listens to it my girlfriends name is tigist tache she lives in ethiopia i met her last year we could not kiss in public because there was too many people watching at special relationships are illegal on ywam bases even if you are in africa the rules still dont change of course there are always people who flout the rules but it is best not to in the interests of public safety my fingers get tired before my brain slows down i was born in the united kingdom i am a crazy freak it is funny how with a party line lots of people can be talking at the same time i am a faithless lover i am my sisters brother i am my fathers son and mummys boy i dont know where i go with my flow i dont call them mummy and daddy anymore i call them mum and dad we got out of the habit eventually this is a brief history of me i used to make up songs at school things i had never experienced like songs about being in gangs in america or pygmees in jungles in south america or cotton picking down south in alabama or all those style of songs which is like slave songs or negro spirituals i was completely ignorant of other cultures i love africa i want to go back there when i get enough money to return i want to die under african skies i love rap music everything i touch turns to hip hop that is how i think even if it is not hip hop it all turns to hip hop in my head life is good i live in a cemetery i love watching movies with african american actors my favourites are denzel washington and halle berry for winning the oscars and on the obscure tip i like queen latifah whoopie goldberg and danny glover i am human i am stupid i am thinking thoughts and feelings i hope my parents look at this website shout out goes to all my homies at samoan aog you know who you are you will always be my peeps even when i am overseas the flow still goes deep with the love for the streets i love my house i love my television i miss its shiny warm inner glow it feels so good to just be a zombie for the night to walk among the undead scooping brains out from peoples heads i hate it that dark is always associated with evil i want to bring the shining black light of truth to the world to paraphrase the boondocks i feel like a black man in a white mans body i hate what i was born as but which i have no abilitiy to change so i may as well fight for other peoples rights it is so hard to be a hip hopper i live such a deprived life for a middle class freak i dont know i was born overseas but i feel as if this country is my home now but at the same time i have a peverse otherworldliness to my house it is like entering an alternative dimension of fake englishness i dont know what to do with the rest of my life i will be nice to all the people that want to get on the net and only be five minutes more because i cant think of anything worth searching for other t han gods love there was lots of interesting stories i heard but i dont want to break any confidentiality agreements so i will stick to ripping off my past because everybody knows i have no future maybe i will come back later to search the net purely for the sake of looking at lyrics which i can filter through the blender in my head i love turning alternative into rap because i am crazy like that which is how i survived at my old church at petrie i still go to a samoan church but my new one is at zilmere i must be sure when i go home to note down all the email addresses of all my friends so i can stay in touch with them my parents delete all emails that have already been looked at with their permission i will relay their tasmanian adventures to make this site more interesting they went to a book conference that is all i know when my parents were first married one of them worked at a carrot factory the other worked at an onion factory i used to walk like speedy gonzales when i was at school and go arriva arriva hummidy hummidy or whatever it is they made me sing la bamba too but i didnt know the worlds all the year seven girls liked to hear me go viva forever by the spice girls and i got my first art commission for twenty cents each for south park characters kenny kyle stan and cartman life goes on i have so many memories i dont know where to start i want to be alive i used to be happy god is good all the time hallelujah twenty four seven i like to listen to people tell stories about their lives but i dont know what to do with mine i went to school and school was cool but all the teachers hated me and none of the girls ever dated me but shout out to my peeps prina and susan we were the outcasts the antisocials and we had a blast playing handball or making up crosswords i keep my style absurd one sheep against the herd gods love makes the world go round i was lost and my soul was found now i am finally heaven bound god bless love zombiefleshthemoonfaceone   ¶ 8:01 PM

  i am human i sat in a room today with lots of people in it life is good life is fun for everyone we all sit in circle tables and sit down on our chairs i dont make any sense because i am not trying the curtains are pink i think nothing my brain is empty today the sky is foggy there are people playing sports in the park but i dont want to join them because i am addicted to computers but my plan is to get off as soon as possible just give me a few minutes for sure its all good in the hood i should have gone to my samoan church the last two weeks i am definitely going this week and every week after that i need to get back in the game or otherwise i will go insane we went to class today and we had to think of what to say about god and lectures and all that other good stuff that people do they rubbed my poem off the board but thats ok because it sucked anyway last night i went to bed at one am i love being a freak i dont care what anybody thinks i am a useless waste of space i hope i get lots of encouragement notes i hope my website gets lots of hits i hope i am famous when i am dead because being a celebrity while alive is just too much pressure you know what im saying probably nothing i had a dream last night i was paddling down a river and the ghosts were soaring above my head i have the same dream every night i go shopping and i tunnel down a spiral staircase which leads to hell i have lots of dreams about hell and darth vader and star wars i had a nightmare when i was a little kid when i watched sinbad the sailor because it was full of ghost and demons i love horror movies and hate them at the same time i think they are funny but then they give me nightmares like anchovies which is why i give plugs to vegetarian pizza but not the crusty sort because that makes me sick the blinds i closed i cant see outside of them life is good i dont know what to do today or tomorrow there has to be more to life than this i looked at ten bloggs not back to back but i did look at them eli played guitar in morning service we had discussion groups we had to talk about communication which is like talking about talking which we did yesterday as well albeit unofficially i wanted to do hospitality but they shut the door on me maybe i can switch teams next time i dont agree that christians must be covert i am fully reliant on god i pray until something happens i think every day what would jesus do i feel no need to hide my christianity love me or hate me i know i am a hypocrite but that doesnt stop me believing in god even if i am a sinning lying scumbag and a horrible person i know that god always forgives me no matter how many times i mess up i go to church to get filled up with god it is like a spiritual petrol station life is weird i cant understand people i wish i was deep but i am shallow as i puddle that doesnt make you sink into eternal doom want to be a super computer and create a virus in your environment maybe i am crazy i dont know i love hip hop i want to be a rapper but i can never remember my lyrics it always takes time to think them up but then i can never remember what they are i am going to do this until three and then give people some time to themselves i am only going to blogg for another ten minutes i wish i had something interesting to say i have already told you guys and girls where i was born and where i will go when i die i plan on going to heaven unless god has other plans sometimes i feel like a pumpkinhead like some kind of cowardly custard chickenhead i cant make any sense of my life my sister is a beauty therapist she does bikini waxing eyebrow tints and facial massage life goes on with or without me i love the way girls sing i wish i was human but i am a freaky alien being my fingers are my mouth when i dont feel like speaking god is good all the time god made the heavens and the earth i love jesus because he died on the cross i once asked a guy out on a date as a dare so i could get three ice blocks as pay off but then everybody at school thought i was gay until they moved on to somebody else to pick on i had to fish for coins in the mud i was made to sing for my supper i hate school i hate teachers i hate students i hate myself and i want to die life is good life is fun for everyone do you want to play with me i feel so lost and lonely i keep on running on empty nothing really matters when my heart of glass shatters i could get my tips frosted like a blondie wannabe i dont know i just go too far i love tricky and david bowie and missy elliot and queen latifah and tupac shakur and norah jones and i am just another stupid kid making bloggs but i love bloggs and i love god and i love my dog but my dog is dead but god is not dead which can only be a good thing i dont know what to do with the rest of my life my team is singing at rugby world cup that is something to be proud of i feel afraid to open up to people my girlfriend lives in africa she has one brother like i have one sister so we both come from two child families with both parents working for a living that has to be something in common some kind of love connection life would be so much easier if my girlfriend lived in australia instead of ethiopia i want to go to africa and see her again but i have to get a job and save my money first i wish i could understand the way the world works it seems cruel to bring a baby into this world when there is so much war and famine and poverty and ugliness going down but my girl is beautiful truly stupendous i dont say much about her but i love her more than words can say it is kind of hard to remember what she looks like but we send each other letters to keep in touch and i did call her on her birthday or at least in the same week even if i did wake her up from her sleep and call her in the middle of the night it took a month to pay off my phone bill but it was worth it i wonder why people think ywam is a cult because they have to pay money to go there but i know t his is just like any other multicultural interdenominational christian organization there was a problem in perth with student visas there was no other news we had to get in passion groups my passion is music i hate everything else i wanted to do art but it didnt exist this year for talking about it i am human i am a boy or a man child only young still i am old before my time maybe i am going on too much about things i am ignorant of i wonder if everybody is back from playing sports yet i am only going to do this as long as i have voices in my head i wonder if they will ever shut up i dont think so see im talking to myself again that is the first sign of madness this is a good way to indulge my insanity by pretending it doesnt exist i hope that i can see my friends when i go to church i spent money on chocolate phone calls frisbees and playing cards and dolphin necklaces instead i should send money to my girlfriend so she doesnt break up with me i am afraid of what the future holds i am going to talk to my parents tomorrow they are coming back from tasmania today they went for a week to a book conference this is the life i have led i am a crazy kid i was born with a brain disease but you already know that what can i tell you that you dont already know about me it is hard to believe i am able to open up to people i have never met in my entire life and the truth is i would never talk this much to actual flesh and blood humans because i know they would be bored to tears so why should you be any different i hear voices of people working on base i can never understand anybody communication is talking and listening that is the only thing i agree on i dont think that i have to be an angel wearing a demon mask if we are sheep in wolves clothing how will we ever get them saved i always make too many assumptions and generalisations there are little beads connecting the blinds together soon i will get off and try to read the oath by frank perritti i will read until my eyes bleed i am going to buy a scrapbook and try to find old magazines so i can make ransom notes and fill it with lots of crazy things and maybe i will get some photos of my family and pets i wish i was dead but i have no regrets i am making a book for my friend who comes from china but was born in america life goes on i love my ethiopian girlfriend i will not cheat on her i will stay faithful no matter how much i get tempted i have to try not to make any spelling mistakes it is weird how i had to learn at school with a mat over my fingers i hated computer class and maths class the teachers all screamed in my ears then i had a sweet norweigan teacher who would whisper when she was trying to laugh and there was a few girls who came and went but never stayed too long this window is full of empty air i can look down on all the people when they are gobbling food i wish i was a character in asterix and obelix comics i dont think i will be able to do this at home unless dad gives me time on the internet i have to keep up to date with all the stupid and cool things that i do in my crazy life at least my friends can look at this page even if nobody else wants to i will be able to keep them posted and my closest friends understand that i have brain problems so i dont always mean what i say but when i do and it is important then i will let you know so you can tell the difference when i am trying to be sincere and when i am just making things up as i go along but i like to alternate between poems and diary and i can hardly tell the difference between fact and fiction anymore so long all you world wide web freaks and geeks hit me up at zombiefleshthemoonfaceone@hotmail.com god bless love daniel   ¶ 10:00 PM

  try to find some way to fill the emptiness in my head the life i thought was dead has come back the same way it used to be easy to be me but suddely i see things a different way i have got eyes at the back of my mind if these walls could talk what would they find out i hesitate for too long so i never levitate i only exaggerate that i am the enemy of the state when love turns to hate what can you do to turn the tables save yourself get out while there is still hope for you i was bored with watching walls bleed angels mend wings singed by the sun get too close start to fry get my brains burned to nothing ashes to ashes dust to dust crushed in a traffic jam made into the next son of sam this crazy freak who ends up mashed up on the freeway on a road to nowhere tune into your frequency believe in what you want to be deceive nobody receive the blessing you get for being original and the best no more no less throw your hands in the sky pigs might fly i was born on another planet dont know how i got here come down to earth be open and honest express what you want to do with the rest of your life now you have got so much time on your hands i wonder do you want my money or love sometimes it is hard to tell i wish i was sincere i have so much bitterness that will never disappear i wish i could make you feel good inside so many feelings that i just cant hide i love you so black and beautiful brown sugar can i express love and tenderness sometimes it feels so hard to break the ice to get beyond immediate concerns to the heart of the matter to understand the distance between thunderclaps you count the mississippis fishing for pippies losing my grip starting to slip over the edge into this bottomless pit full of snakes who are out to get me wolves in hot pursuit but they keep barking up the wrong tree still got a long way to go before i find peace of mind acting friendly jealous ones still envy i am all over the place i dont know what i want i never get what i need from you just want some photos of you pictures to stick on my wall is this a relationship where are we going from here i dont know feels so weird i was never faithful i could never stop cheating on you and what is eating me is the jealousy that you might be with somebody else and pretending that you still love me why cant i trust you why does long distance mess with my head why cant i deal with all the pain inside of broken relationships in the past i try to understand you i want to speak your language i wish i was black then life would be so much easier you would lack for nothing if i had my ways i wish you were here with me instead of over there a million miles away and it hurts so bad that i feel so sad because they took your love away from me we were not allowed to reveal ourselves as true lovers secret identities hidden public display of affection not allowed join in the city life follow the bright lights to the place you can call your own where your heart belongs in a house away from home i have difficulty experiencing my nightmares come true lost and lonely without you i wish i could be good but i feel so bad and my life just makes me mad that we are seperated by rivers and oceans i express to you my feelings and emotions so if you are in computer class click on blogger dot com and raise your glass dress for success no longer lost in the wilderness we got each other we love each other we will always be friends forever and lovers until the end of time never discovered now that the secret is uncovered it was so hard to hide the truth to not tell all my friends about you but i will not deny you any longer i will tell all my friends i have a girlfriend who lives in africa who has a dad for a doctor and a cook for a mum i got it all the wrong way round staying in the country with relatives i try to think positive not negative thoughts if i got somebody to love it gives me something to aim for a reason to live with you to love and adore as much as i love you i wish you were here come down under and we can be free from responsibilities if you want to stay in the guest room only real love can take away my gloom and doom i never assume i need to know what is on your mind seek and you will find i was travelling around in a hot air balloon zombiefleshthemoonfaceone when the day is done living life to the maximum i still dont know how to finish this dirty deeds i must confess say no and mean yes god bless love daniel the author of this rhyme got to go with the flow because im running out of time better check your head up before jesus comes back only christ can save your life can you cut me some slack it is the word that you heard one sheep against the herd even if it sounds absurd listen look and observe i swerve to avoid a collision course use the power of the flower use the force to get to where you want to be it took a long time for me to see that without you i am nothing running on empty spinning circles round my head try to get street cred from these philosophical thoughts it feels so hard to be away i am here to stay for a little while then i will come back to see you again and make contact even if emcees find me whack we got a connection between white and black we got love multicultural love is the best kind no more casting pearls before swine my babies will be strong and fit good at sports they never quit i cant wait to operate my love machine is oh so clean i got whipped cream see you in my dream team on the other side of next year when you come down under steal my thunder want to steal your kisses make you my missus you look so tasty and delicious so waste me if i ever speak ill of you take too many pills and shoot through i wont leave you holding the baby i will stick around because every thug needs a lady i dont need drugs i got true love just me and my girlfriend the party never ends god bless love zombiefleshthemoonfaceone have fun in the sun all you people on the world wide web   ¶ 8:11 PM

  today i woke up and we spent half the day not in lectures just sitting down trying to summarise the lectures of the past two weeks i got showered i got dressed i did all the usual things i got offered some chocolate so i put it in the fridge to eat when i finish my fast i want to fast for forty days and forty nights and then i will go back to eating i will try to read more of the bible in order to get closer to god i wish there was some way of knowing if people read these or not but as long as this exists i at least have a place to stick my thoughts which can only be a good thing maybe by the time i leave ywam i will have been able to use this to process ideas i would never be able to say out loud to deal with all the dark and mysterious sides of myself that i have never been willing to explore who am i kidding i am not deep i cant sell my soul because i have no soul to sell i think via circular reasoning i love music i am a boy i am human life tastes good i went to lectures this morning with an open mind i drank tea and milo instead of coffee because i think it is affecting me in a bad way maybe i should just have a lesser amount instead of a whopping big tea spoon i always major on the small things that never really matter i used to get worked up about dishes one time i was not allowed to go to the coast because i was fussing over a stain inside a teacup i am never as fussy over how i wash my own dishes as how other people wash theirs it is weird i live a life of double standards i have one rule for others and another rule for me i was born a long time ago i have to try not to repeat myself my brain keeps spinning round in circles i want to have original thoughts i want to use this as an outlet for my aggression if i love somebody or hate them all my obsessions will be here i am talking about my past present and future i went to a school that was supposedly christian but there was more an emphasis on education than getting closer to god there was altar calls for sure and people went down under the power of the holy spirit but i could see no change i think at school i was anti god for a long time i would not sing songs at church unless they said jesus in it but really that was just a convenient excuse to read library books in church and not participate i still struggle to pay attention in sermons and not to fall asleep in lectures is kind of the same thing i tried to learn to drive a few weeks ago and i failed dismally but i will try again next year i got a christian teacher from western australia i hope my girlfriend in ethiopia is feeling fine i miss her heaps it has been a long time since i last saw her face i dont know what to think about love i think doing this has helped me to open up to people more it is like a private way of going public if that makes any sense which it probably doesnt i am going to look at other sites apart from other peoples bloggers today i am a human being living in outer space god is good all the time god bless love zombiefleshthemoonfaceone   ¶ 7:48 PM

  time to start revolting my comments are insulting nail in the hand im bolting the door shut never giving up shut my mouth turn this game around eyes full of flames no sound in my head grow to love the emptiness inside went for a ride came back again refreshed got blessed dont know what is best for you to do what you wish floating round in a petri dish i want to extinguish all flames remember the flying fish who came years before to play games down by the shore oh the humanity got to love the insanity of staying alive hanging on after a high school education which never taught all the rules of the game having free reign let me do my own thing here i am back again pouring down fire and rain hoping somebody out there will understand the crazy way i feel how i struggle to keep it real let me out shut me down broken machines turn the crank stick that mouse under the cheese wheel give me the real deal see we are all victims of society some of us are just more lucky than others better watch out for the buzzards not sure how to give up trying living and dying got this fear of flying part of the grieving process leaving well alone not getting obsessed with things that dont matter in the slightest stay commited to a full time relationship not diverting from my plan and purpose to be here and get educated in the ways of god to come to a deeper understanding of who god is weird feelings inside my mind want to leave this world behind inspiration nowhere to be found i am hiding deep down underground soon i will be gone dont plan to stick around for too long pay the money pack my bags and go travel nice and slow finally can i get it right switch off switch on begin to understand my heart is crying my pets are dying wish i could ressurect them breathe life into my dead dogs mouth it is so hard dealing with death even after the turds hit the fan i sink like a stone into a sea of misery this will always be part of my history through it all god is protecting me from harm as i stare into the eye of the storm and bees and birds swarm round my head in a flurry of wings these furious things which come out of the cupboard when the lights go down put a few slugs through my chest cardiac arrest better get some rest from those anxiety attacks find no use for worry warts embrace the future before it comes to pass give me a lot of things to look at that i dont want to see express yourself with honesty soon i will be gone head for the hills it has been a long time since i left you but i am coming back to see your face again so come round to my place and we can watch movies turn the lights down low travel nice and slow through the neighbourhood we hold those block parties even when comatose you can still move your feet and wiggle your toes even if you have to pay through the nose my friend swimming with sharks costs an arm and a leg it is no walk in the park or a day at the beach here there is no room for coasters and floaters drowning in my waterwings am i commited enough can you feel the power and the passion of flower energy slaves to fashion dont want to break the cycle cant stop spinning round in circles avoid audio sensory overload of visual images and sound advice i hear noises spooky creatures haunting shadows coming ever closer to the edge this is the way i want to be in a place i am temporarily inhabiting because i have no choices guided by voices back to reality though i come from a cold place my heart is warm i seek gods face look to the heavens jesus is coming back go figure that can you give me some slack make contact with aliens from outer space we are all members of the human race i can hardly contain this venom bubbling inside me now i fall off the wagon drop your weapons baptised in lemons not sure how to respond abscond with the heat rash make a mad dash for your cash i do nothing but scones im just middle class trash sound like the culture clash you get when you try to mix rap with rock into some kind of alternative for urban rage get you to turn the page scrolling up and down the screen i dont know what you mean tell me how it feels to keep it real in this world i am sleeping in the stardust where the wolves are finding answers to their prayers dogs are barking up the wrong tree they are never gonna get to you and me we will be safe far from the maddening crowd dont worry baby you drive me crazy even though you are a million miles away i feel for you passionate emotions eternal devotion and nothing will ever change my mind when i seek it is you i find think i must be going blind is it cruel to be so kind god bless love zombiefleshthemoonfaceone aka denial incarnate aka ghost who walks aka cosmic jester aka crackavelli the dumb krilluminadi aka daniel peace out good day good night hope all you peeps out there on the world wide web have a happy life :)  ¶ 10:01 PM